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1.
When you feed your girlfriend a big meal and forbid her from shitting for the next 7 hours, then do her from behind whilst fingering her butthole so you get a nice juicy wad of poop.
Then write a special message on her back and invite your closest friends to jizz on top of it. Wait for it to dry, then peel it off so you can post it on her fridge.
"Valentine's Day was coming up and I wanted to get her something special, so I gave her the post-it!"
by dear baby jesus in the cradle January 09, 2012
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