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1.
The ruler and arbiter of all things totally awesome.

The King of Rad's duties include determining what is and isn't cool at any given period of time, resolving differences in opinion regarding how gnarly an action may or may not be, accurately adjusting how tubular certain objects are and measuring how righteous any given situations is. Unfortuately, the inverse is also part of the obligation and although most are loath to do it, if something is indeed sucky it must be decried as such.

The onus of being The King of Rad often overcomes those that hold the position. The responsibility can never truly be comprehended until it is experienced first hand. The current King of Rad has gone into hiding from his subjects, being unable to handle the barrage of suplicants. Widely known as Mr. Door (which may or may not be an alias) news of him occasionally surfaces on the intertron, interweb and webbernet. The position cannot be abdicated, over taken or conferred to another and only passes on after the death of the current king.

Due to his majesty's absence, stop gap measures have arisen in the populace to serve the sweetness rating needs. Some examples are the crude awsome scale and the very limited Rad Scale. The Scale of Dinosaurs, though, is by and large considered to be the most uber due to the fact that dinosaurs are kickass.

The highest rating The King of Rad can bestow is Totally Rad to the Max. The lowest is, of course, teh suck.
The King of Rad recently declared that aqua socks rock his socks... off.
We think it's time for a regime change.
by Nothus July 16, 2005