1. Place the jam in the recipients bum hole
2. Push the cork as far into the ass as possible
3. Then, brand the recipient with the branding iron (preferably with the shape of a large genitalia)
4. The recipient then should poop/fart as hard as possible rendering a jam explosion out of their anus
5. Have the recipient then eat the jam and yell "Jimmy Fest!" as loud as possible (preferably while chocking on the shitty jam"
6. While your partner chokes to death, sing "Living in the sunlight" by Tiny Tim