The Colne is a school in Brightlingsea where 6O% of students are idiotic Swagfags and 3O% are indies. 1O% are normal people who try to not fit in but have 0 confidence because the other students are so fucking judgmental.

9O% of students in a year group smoke by the end of year 8. Its nice to know that the other 1O% actually have brains.

Ofsted said the school is outstanding but that's a fucking lie because all the popular kids who think they're better than anyone else ruin lessons by being little shits and nobody gets work done.

The buses always have fucking crashes and kids nearly die.

The only good teacher is Mr Coleman.

Wilkinson are the only good house and will win everything. Radcliffe are the fucking worst, and loose everything. Nobody really gives a shit about the other two houses.
Parent: I wont send my child to The Colne Community School and College because I don't want him/her to fucking die.
by peteuemoswag July 21, 2013

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