|1.||The CFK Disease|
The CFK Disease occurs when being married forever and not having sex in over two months, you forget how to use your penis and it doesn't want to come out to play anymore. This occurs to men at any age. Especially the men age 18 - 40. This occurs when your wife would rather watch Medium, Las Vegas, or some other stupid show. When asked why doesn't she just skip the show for one night the following response is said, "I work hard. then i come home clean the house, help the kids with their homework, give them baths, etc." She then goes into a speech about what you don't do around the house and blames every F'n thing wrong with the world on you.
What she doesn't realize is that 18 hours out of the day she's on her cell phone with Lord knows who talking about stuff that doesn't make sense. Masturbating to online porn only works for so long. Afterwards, you just give up and your penis starts to shrivel up like a grape. This disease is worst than AIDS, CANCER, SARS, The Black Plague, etc. You get so used to not having sex, that by the time the wife is ready to have sex, you'd rather sleep. And as you're lying there you call her a Bitch until you fall asleep. There is no cure.
One research test was done by taking the wife to a local hotel/casino, gambled a little, drank a little, listened to a live band, and then went up to the room with the jacuzzi. The result was her falling asleep.
The only cure would be to get a divorce, join the monestary, or find a parttime girlfriend.
Husband: (I hope I don't get The CFK Disease tonight) Honey, I had fun tonight gambling, drinking, listening to that band, eating at that cafe, and sitting in the jacuzzi. How about a little freaky sex?
Wife: Ok. (stares blankly into space. And then falls asleep while giving a hand job)
Husband: Hey. Hey. Wake up. This is a sign of The CFK Disease that I read about on Urban Dictionary.