a state in southwest usa, where it's illegal to penetrate your wifes rectum consensually
husband: hey i wanna fuck you in the ass tonight
wife: in the state of texas its illegal
husband: are you serious? fuck that lets move back to cali
by big_joe13 June 01, 2009
The only place that's more American than America.
You're moving to Texas? That's the place where people are more American than Americans.
by stephierburck March 10, 2012
The only state where you can get the death penalty for jaywalking.
At the Texas grocery store, six-year old Louis tore open a bag of gummi worms and took one out, then ate it. After surveillance cameras caught him, he was arrested and sentenced to death.
by twistedbabydoll August 18, 2007
A state with small penis syndrome and chewy bbq.
"I'm from Texas and I always have to say I'm bigger and badder and I drive a big ole Truck because my penis is really small."
by its4oclockandihavenothingtodo March 18, 2013
Hitting the road at 85 mph, legally. Texas has the fastest open roads in America.
God blessed Texas!
by I ride my horse to work. March 21, 2013
the only thing bigger than infinity
you know whats bigger than infinity

what?

texas
by rick mavis April 29, 2007
i wasnt born in texas, i was born in connecticut. i eventually moved to texas, and i never plan on leaving. i have lived everywhere, england, california, alabama. texas kicks major ass. lemme clear up a few things for u fucking retards:

1) texas doesnt have the highest concentration of gays in the US california does. ever heard of san francisco? it is one of the 10 most populated cities in the US and it is the gay capital of the US. go to san francisco and i bet u wont find many straight clubs. thats where u belong anyway

2) "heard of the silicon valley? also, Microsoft is in Washington"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! everyone, if u give a shit about where microsoft hq is, let me know................. anyone?...................out there?...........someone?................guess not

3) "don't make any comments about Arnold Schwarzenegger. he's still Republican, while California isn't"
Well now,...... could u please tell me how the fuck that managed to happen? i didnt realize political parties could make u blush.

4) "george bush also won the state of Texas in the 2000 presidential election"
i would think that would happen 'cuz he is a republican and so is texas, dumbfuck.

5) "i'm sure alaskans would say their weather isn't bad, because they're used to it."
california has earthquakes, they can sometimes kill thousands of people at a time, but thats ok, im sure they are all used to it.

6) "however, you don't see anyone moving to Texas for the weather, do you?"
hold on, i must have missed when you made a logical point out of this statement. why the hell would anyone move anywhere because of weather. if weather really bothers u that much, stay the fuck indoors, pussy.

7) "snow and hail, in the middle of summer"
i could not stop myself after reading this one. i had to get on the floor and roll laughing for at least 10 minutes. it doesnt snow in texas u imbecil. and hail, i havent seen hail in this state in 6 years. how could it snow this far south. that is the kind of genious thinking that got the Governator elected.

8) "the corrupt oil tycoons, Enron executives"
yeah i know, enron was started in texas, so what? am i supposed to feel ashamed of myself. it aint workin yet. wherever u live ought to be ashamed of themselves because of a failure like u. i didnt even understand the sentence i took this quote from, i took the most coherent part. u need to go back to preschool english class where a shit for brains dumbfuck like u belongs.

9) yes, we do have (and use) the death penalty."

"-this is something to be happy about..? if this is meant to be impressive, Utah's death penalty is death by firing squad. and, yes, they use it to"
death by firing squad eh? trust me, i give a shit. no really (cough). is THAT something to brag about. well at least i can brag about intelligence instead of how people get killed in a state. Utah uses firing squads, WHOPPIE!! u just made my day. but i'll humor u with the ooooooooooooo and aaaaaaaaaaah i think u were after.

Texas is a fine state which deserves no ridicule at all. u can either love texas, or get the fuck out.
u guys seriously need to consider what u say from now on to make sure it isnt that stupid ever again
by Psycho August 11, 2004

Free Daily Email

Type your email address below to get our free Urban Word of the Day every morning!

Emails are sent from daily@urbandictionary.com. We'll never spam you.

×