Hahahaha yo it's hilarious how "ya'll" Texans think bigger is so much better, the only thing bigger in Texas is your women, nipples, and percentage of unemployment. Please, just please try and find me one person who really WANTS to move to Texas and for what reason, so they have an excuse to have sex with their realli hot Aunt Josephine? I just wish everyone in the world could just go into Texas and beat the shit out of every sister fucking redneck in the massive dump they call a state. I use to live in Texas but then got the fuck out and moved north to New York so my balls would stop sticking together. It's unbelieveable how I lived in that piece of shit for 16 years, thank God I'm out and I thank all you "H-Town" home boys for your ghetto inspiring rap sounds you like to call "songs". Also, thanks a whole fucking lot for giving us this piece of shit president that REALLY has no clue what the fuck he's doing. Stop getting mad and all self defensive because you don't like people making fun of you, get the hell out and people will respect you. If anyone of you can find a way out of that shit hole, go for it and realize what all those cow boy hats and boots do to you.
1st dude- yo I'm from Texas

2nd dude- yo your a fat fuck

1st dude- nah i snuck in from mexico, i'm not really fat i'm just trying to blend it with the crowd

2nd dude- well that fat suit is awesome, you look just like everyone else here
by xy xy xy xy xy July 27, 2006
A freaky ass state in the USA consisiting of corrupt "sherriffs" (weird versions of cops), who go around beating people up and pulling out a gun whenever they feel like it. Make sure you don't jay walk in Texas or you may get the left side of your head blown off. Speaking of guns..everyone owns a gun in Texas.
SherriffTex1:"howdy!why i feel rather inclined to shoot that damn naggit trouble makers eyes out of his sockets!"
SherriffTex2:"well he's asking for it...who does he think he is to be walking across that road when the little man is flashing red? Why paint my tooth white and call it brushed!!! "
by lamchop September 11, 2004
A state of mind in which nothing exists in the known cosmos.
Jonny: Yeah, I wanted to buy a new LaCoste shirt at Nieman Marcus.
Geoff: What did you goet?
Jonny: Nothing, all the sales people were from Texas.
by Bluedog June 24, 2005
texas is the hometown of ma fave band BOWLING FOR SOUP and they rock. c'mon yall lets move 2 texas 2 look at pics of jesus while eating waffles!! if u hate texas im not speking to you....
u come 2 texas and dis it i will, i shit u not, kick ur freaking pansy ass!
by lizze October 25, 2006
Cowboy up
its get tough or mosey on out

Giddyup
Keep up or head for the trails

Hold your horses
or get beat up
Well Texas is the lone star state. It doesnt need anyone else especially no Oklahoma. And for any of yall that are mistaken for George Dubya, he is a damn yankee. Even though he may make mistakes and resided in Texas this is America and we should all still support him. Any true Texan would agree, ah hail what am i sayin hes a damn yankee. lynch him.

The south will rise again
by Tina July 28, 2004
Let me explain texas, the only thing big in texas are all the woman's asses, peoples mouths, attitudes and egos. People in Texas should realize by looking at their map, that my forefathers from Oklahoma, built 17 bridges to get the hell out of Texas and back into God's country. If they are not smart enough, 99.9% of Texans are also the lowest form of human being that lives on the face of this planet. Feel free to kick my ass if you think you can get the job done. Bring Mexico with you because, Sam Houston should have got his asskicked. Cause you are all half spic and half nigger half polack, and 100% the stupidest asses
Texas is south of Oklahoma It is windy there because Kansas blows and Texas Sucks. Further more if you dont like what I have to say then you can all kiss Oklahoma rosy red rebel Dick with a side of sweet potatoes. Quit telling the farmers game wardens and police officers that you were trying to help the sheep through the fence, go straight to hell and call me when you get there.
The state that produces the most stuck up idiots in the freakin' world. Most, in fact are pretty good-looking, but they are freakin' full of this stupid Texas-pride shit. YOU'RE NOT YOUR OWN COUNTRY ANYMORE! GET OVER IT!
Texans are gay and suck simply because of their "I'll take it up the ass for you Texas" pride shit. If they didn't have that, they'd be good to go.
by Platypus Ranger February 24, 2006
1> Two hundred sixty-seven thousand square miles of mercurial and tempestuous weather, populated by fourteen million cowboys, longhorns, and aggies. As well as a few of us normal folks.

2> A state of mind induced by stacked cuban heels, drop yoke shirts, ten gallon hats that only hold 1.5 litrers, and Alice B. Toklas' Famous Brownie Recipie.

3> The New and Official Location of the North Pole.
If the Devil wiped his ass on North America, Texas is the shitstain he left behind.

Ah may live in New Yolk City, but I carries texus in mah heart.

As goes Texas, so goes the world.
by Uncle Spunky March 13, 2005
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