*R U Callin Ma Mam?
*R U Startin Me U?
*Get 'ere u lil twat am gunna lay u out
*Chantel get back ere u u fuckin twat
*Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck (for lack of a better word.)
Basically, they are monkeys with cider, if your ever in a fight with a group of these people, go for the alpha male.
He'll be the one with the biggest bottle of cider,if tyou take him down then you have won the fight, the rest of them will run in fear.
On the subject of the opposite sex, it is often possible to observe the phenomenon of the "girl towny". This female variety is not dissimilar to the male variety, except that even more white clothing is worn, in stark contrast to the often orange war-paint worn caked over the faces of female townies. This serves to obliterate the feaures of the "girl townies" and cleverly hide the fact that the male and female of the species are almost indistinguishable without aids to appearance.
Interpersonal relationships among their own groups are often primitive, centred around cheap sexual conquests and who is going to "batter" who. The two are often linked.
The activities displayed by townies often serve to demonstrate a deep-seated aggression, often causing behaviour associated with extreme aggressiveness and violence. This includes a tendency to veer towards a non-towny in the street and "start on" them, at the same time accusing the aforementioned non-towny of doing the same to them. This is often accompanied by swearing, usually "Come on then, you f**king c**t!" or similar aggressive twaddle.
Townies generally have no knowledge of how their sub-culture started, as despite their apparent embracing of black culture, they are usually more likely to take part in a racist assault than normal people like you or I. In fact, any group assault is likely to have townies at the root of the problem.
I hope you have enjoyed reading my definition. If any more evidence/information is required, feel free to watch Crimewatch UK and look at the CCTV footage of street violence. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. Seriously, do it.
Norm#1: "Oh. Right. Tasteful ring."
They listen to generic 'gangsta' 'phat' 'beatz', and are so underground and rebellious that the music they like is one of the most commercial and mass produced/marketed musical styles ever. They also like bob marley despite never listening to him or acknowledging his pacifist message, but whenever they get a chance, they cover all school design projects with ganja leaves, making it cool to be slowly killing themselves. They also manage to make anything into a sex reference.
EG: *actual conversation*
townie 1: Yo man, she iz wel fit, innit!
(points at ugly female townie with face offensive to anyone with eyes)
townie 2: Yo meen da 1 wit' da Burba...bur.. burbar..red cap?
Townie 1: I'd like to wear 'er capyo no wat i meen?
Townie 1: (looks confused,thinks for a minute) ... Yeah man, innit!
What an intellect, eh? Seriously, townies are hard people, if they outnumber you 50 to 1, they will consider attacking you until they realise that they'd rather be doing it with their sister/brother. They also prove how 'ard they are by shouting 'ya mum' at you. they kiss their 'bitches' in public, and have no sense of people looking and thinking: 'what a load of *****s', because theyre cool to their 'cru', so obviously their lives will amount to more than a part time job at mcdonalds drive thru. No, wait...
Normal person: You
Townie:so u fink ur solid, huh?
normal person: well i'm not a liquid, if that's what you mean...
townie: (to cru) Right, get 'im, innit!
(townies get beaten up)
Townie: Right, i'll get ma (insert family member here) on u
Then, the family member comes, the same thing happens andthey get more and older family members on you. This process is called the aging cycle, and it reapeats itself till they get to the age when most townies die (26)
whats with these townies where nike shox?
tucking their joggers into their socks,
their mothers were slags and their fathers were jocks,
In their exams, they failed their mocks,
Before they leave school, they'll have babies in flocks,
When their 16, they'll be in wedding frocks,
taking the piss outta greebos in docs,
Walk aroudn in big herds, their fucking cocks!
hehe i made this up ages ago randomly.
i hate townies. kill them all now & save the world! the human race is polluted!
they also like to beat up people who say anything.
Characterised by their clothes, consisting of tracksuits. Logos are a must; also, a recent tread is to wear a hat at the odd angles, AND have a hood up at the same time. In broad daylight. Suspicions are rising that they are going nocturnal.
Another characteristic is the speech. They try to be 'gangsta muthafuggas', taken from American culture. Hey, what do you know; it WAS Rap. Also any phrases (or noises) are taken from popular TV shows. Like 'Bo Selecta', a comedy show. They have a penchant for the word "mint".
Examples of Towny 'speech'
"PROPA NAAARH" <==> "Proper no."
"YA SHTARTIN ME" <==> "You wanna start a fight?"
"PROPA BO" <==> "Wow, that's awesome."
"UEEEH!" <==> No translation. It could be a mating call.
Behaviours consists of:
* Walking into your shoulders, claiming you wanna start a fight, even if they had to come across the road to bump into your shoulders.
* Generally takin' drugs and getting drunk every night, getting rowdy and starting fights.
the list goes on.
they also do not like anyone who does not conform to their ways.
Sample Research was taken from the North Eastern Breed of towny.
<Me> "...do I know you?"
<Townie> "PROPER NAH."
*At which point his friends come over.*
<Me> Sigh -_-.