2. A charmless, pigeon infested concrete grief-hole which has the quirky characteristic of descending alarmingly into poverty and social deprivation the further one travels down the high street. By the time you have reached the bottom all you will find is a drug conselling centre, job centre plus, and a drive thru burger king which doubles as a major thoroughfare for the local rat population.
If you are short of something to do, you could always join the permanent gathering of Superking-puffing reprobates outside ASDA, get some boss-eyed teenager pregnant (in the horrible knowledge that in 3 years she will look like Chief Sitting Bull in a puffa jacket with a lesbian peroxide crewcut), or simply quietly roll a .44 calibre round into the smith and wesson revolver you are packing and blow your brains out.
Despite the best efforts of the local authorities to gentrify the area by adorning it with ghastly wooden sculptures (which, incidently, look like they were hewn by a 5 year old with downs syndrome) and repaving it multiple times at the cost of millions of pounds, Sutton remains a prime candidate for conversion to a ballistic missile target range.
Before this inevitably happens, make sure to come along on a saturday afternoon so that you can enjoy hating the merry-go-round of talentless fuckheads with microphones and musical instruments that cut the stinking air with their Butlins redcoat inspired musical performances.
Many Sutton families are traditionally interested in farming, and within the family there is usually a "Samuel Sutton" who tends to be known within the families and by others as "Sam Sutton".
Sutton families tend to be lighthearted, funny and down to earth, aswell as being obvious farm lovers.
"oh aye and theres little sam sutton on his tractor!"
It has many districts, such as Wallington and Cheam.
You may have read that it is rather chavy. This is totally untrue, when I stroll down the pleasent high street, I spot many yuppies and indeed posh looking people over 50.
Of course, there are some common people but they are in the minority. Crime is also very low indeed.
Sutton is well known for it's fabulous schools. It has 5 grammar schools, all of which are truely brilliant and one of which is in the top 10 of all schools in the UK. Even the comprehensives are significantly above average, Cheam High School springs to mind swiftly.
As far as shopping goes; Sutton caters well.
It has a large Next, a very large Debenhams, Waterstones, HMV, Costa, Starbucks, Cafe' Nero, BHS, M&S, WH Smith, Clinton cards etc.
It also has a large selection of great restaurants (most of which are near Sutton station) Some of these include: Pizza Express, Zizzi, Il Ponte, Prezzo and Brassie Vasherin which is run by Malcolm John, a renowned chef.
You may have heard of Sutton's fantastic library. It's won many awards and is set on 3 large storeys. It included a childrens library, a cafe, a music and dvd floor and an IT suite. It was built in the 1970's but was extensively refurbished in 2004.
I would certainly recommend Sutton to a friend, or indeed anyone out there who apprieciates a pleasent, good value suburban area with easy and fast access to C. London.