Noun. A large sporting event that keeps the male of the species fixated on their television screens and in perfect health for its duration. At the end of the game, those in imperfect health resume the regular rate of calls for oxygen, ambulances, and other health services across the nation. This factoid is documented at answering services for these providers everywhere.

The most accurate depiction of the American lifestyle, which includes consuming, yelling, flashy lights, and idolizing overpaid mongoloids who contribute nothing to society. All while ignoring important issues in the world around them.

The event lasts approximately 17 hours: 14 of which is devoted to advertising products that nobody needs, and the rest is allotted for performances by bland, overhyped pop stars with next to no talent.

There is no actual game played during this event. You see athletes performing tasks such as running, but only about every 5 minutes and it's only for about 4 seconds at a time, then they stop what they are doing and go to commercial.

The truth is that nobody really likes the super bowl. The only reason one would watch this event is because everyone else is watching it, and humans have this psychological need for group solidarity, no matter what bland, inane activity that group happens to be devoted to.

Watching the super bowl (or any sporting event) is like going to church: it's boring, it's repetitive, you can't distinguish one session from another, you don't really know why you're there, and you get nothing out of it in the end. You only do it because you feel as though you are supposed to.

The best damn day of the year. Probably the only day of the year when you can watch TV Four hours straight because you wont even want to get up during the kickass commercials.

A kiss that you have REALLY been waiting for.

The Gayest Overrated Thing On Earth. Millions Of American Men Sit On There Couch Screaming At The T.V Drinking Bear And Jumping Up & Down Every Time Some One Uses There HANDS To Catch Something. Play Breaks Down Every 30 Seconds And Any One Who Is Not An American Fag Has Already Turned Over Or Fell Asleep By Half Time. Supposedly For "Real Men" Because Of The Shit Load Of Protection They Wear. The Actual Event Itself And What They Do At Half Time Is Actually More Interesting Than The Supposed "Game" That Is Being Played. turd

The Super bowl is the crowning of the best American football team in the world. If the rest of the world doesn't want to watch American football then don't, no one is forcing you to. We don't say shit about rugby or whatever the fuck you play, why do you?

N. Excuse for an American football championship, played between the American Football Conference champions and the National Football Conference champions. Included with the "big game" is two weeks of media hype and scanctily clad women/men taking off their clothes during the halftime show