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1.
"Suck On My Cock" is a satirical Christmas send-up, lyrics written by Pacific Northwest shock jock and prolific parodist Bob Rivers and based on the tune of the bestselling "Jingle Bell Rock" by Bobby Helms (1957).

With himself as singer, "Suck On My Cock" was released as part of a Rivers Christmastime satiric CD, and in 2007 as part of Rivers' CD "Rated X Max." Rivers' lyrics graphically recount in first-person the experience of receiving a full and complete act of fellatio by his (possibly) unwilling partner and makes ample use of "Jingle Bell Rock's" tune, multiple stanzas, choruses and chord changes.

The song is offensive, obscene, and politically incorrect but very funny to those who like no-holds-barred satire. It has been covered often in the ensuing years by Matt Rogers and other singers. Downloadable sung versions and lyrics are not difficult to find on the Internet, though good copies of the prior CD releases command a huge premium in the online used-disc market.

If live versions are included, it is hard to measure how high "Suck On My Cock" ranks in Rivers' ample songbook, but it appears to be shaping up as a "guilty" Christmas pleasure along with many of his other Yuletide parodies, such as "Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear" and "Chipmunks Roasting on an Open Fire."

Bob Rivers asserts that he still owns copyright to the lyrics.
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-- "God, I couldn't believe it when the band began to play "Jingle Bell Rock" and the singer started off with 'Stroke on my, lick on my, suck on my cock..."

-- "Yeah, hardcore! But it was pretty late and I don't think people minded "blue" material. Hope you listened up, 'cuz I bet the band won't play it for another 364 days."

-- "Yeah OK, fool, but cyberspace never forgets."

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by al-in-chgo October 29, 2010