Top Definition
Stone job: Pronounced {STONE-JOB!}

Believed to be derived of Spanish and English origins, with its true beginnings shrouded in a history as odd as the act itself.

a) The act of inadvertently neglecting to keep prearranged meetings.

b) The act of absentmindedly abandoning a friend(s) at a house party, without informing said friend(s) of your abrupt departure.

c) The unintended failure to return phone calls for hours, sometimes days and even months on end.

Although the earliest known occurrences are believed to have been committed by a single male in his youth, the term and action have played out over the course of time to include all forms of life.

After years of research and observation it is proven to be an involuntary response to some of, but not limited to, the following: a) self-absorption b) aloofness c) carelessness d) drunkenness e) smoking to much fucking weed.

While a STONE JOB is not malicious in nature, it can be emotionally detrimental to the unsuspecting victim. Without a proper understanding of a STONE JOB it can leave its target with feelings of disorientation, despair, resentment, and depression, some of the effected casualties have reported mild to acute cases of anger, rage, and hatred. In most cases the discomfort subsides within one or two days, but can last in excess of a week depending on the severity of the affliction.

It was thought to be a lost practice until its reemergence in Riverhead, New York, sometime around the mid to late eighties.
Example:

Guy one: Hey, how was the Slayer concert?
Guy two: I don't know Eric never picked me up from work.
Guy one: oh man STONE JOB huh?
Guy two: yeah, but one day I will get even...
by ed fagan January 20, 2008

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A Type of Handjob involving the person giving the handjob glueing multiple rocks to their hands to inflict more pain and stimulate their partner in that manner
"My Girlfriend gave me the best stonejob...but now my dick hurts."

"The best rocks to use for stonejobs are small pebbles."
by MuffinTop1490 December 06, 2009

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