I split mad pussy with my huge stimulus package.
Your mom loves my stimulus package.
- "No dude, every time I walk by the line is out the door. It's basically a stimulus package!!"
The bill's official name is the "American Recovery and Reinvestment Act (ARRA)", which was a forced compromise between the Democrats who wanted to call it the "You Have to Print Money to Make Money Act" and the Republicans who wanted to call it the "Screw our Children with Massive Debt Act"
Obama: "Because without it, job loss would have been far worse and the economy even more depressed."
Reporter: "Wait, how could you possibly know that?"
Obama: "I have a team of people with impressive credentials that told me so after I told them I didn't like their first answer and to give me another answer or be fired"
Reporter: "But, if we can really 'stimulate' our economy by borrowing future earnings and spending it now, wouldn't it just make sense to do this constantly so that our economy is always 'stimulated' and we all become filthy rich?"
Obama: "I like this reporter - Rahm, add him to my cabinet"
Rahm Emanuel: "Uh, sir, I think he's being sarcastic..."
To be rewarded for something you really didn't do.
To want someone to give you something you really don't need or deserve for free.
This has been said around at my job recently.
"Obama should give me a free designer handbag stimulus package."