| 34. | Starbucks | ||
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A really unimpressive coffee company that is over hype by middle school kids who think they are emo but are just hormonal and bitchier than the more superior of the human race. Everything taste like coffee, I shit you not. Go in and get a hot chocolate. What do you expect in your hot chocolate? Hot water, Chocolate mix or syrup... That's simple right? Nah they're all like "Yo, I'mma put coffee in this so that way it just tastes the same as EVERYTHING ELSE in this shop." Way to alienate your possible consumers. Oh and the sizes are a bitch too. Tall? Vente? Grande? Uhm... Aren't tall and grande close to being synonymous? Don't matter, they're all over priced and basically the same size anyways. They're putting their stores in funeral homes. Well that's just fucking depressing. Imagine the people who have to work at those homes and see sad people all day and dead bodies? They make sales expecting people to drown their misery in hot chocolate/ coffee, coffee milk/ coffee flavored coffee.
I wonder what would happen if starbucks opened its own deli. Would the sandwiches be "Ham and coffee grinds?" Or "Coffee bean and swiss?" They would have head cheese but instead of meat in the head cheese it would be coffee grinds. I say "Screw that" Go to dunkin donuts, get yourself a hot chocolate that tastes like it's supposed to. Dude 1: "Yo, let's go to starbucks."
Dude 2: "Do they have non-coffee? I hate coffee" Dude 1: "Yeah... Get a hot chocolate dude that shouldn't be bad" Dude 2: "K" Starbucks cashier: "How may I help you?" Dude 1: "I'd like a small..." Starbucks Cashier: "You mean tall?" Dude 1: "You know what I mean small mocha chai with... Meh fuck it all drinks here taste the same anyways, just pour liquid in a cup and charge me" Starbucks Cashier: "Anything else?" Dude 2: "Get me a grande Hot chocolate with cinnamon" Starbucks Cashier: "Kk that will be $10.82" They pay and get out of there Dude 2: "Bleh... This hot chocolate tastes like COFFEE!!!" Dude 1: "Shit happens when you go to starbucks bro." |
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| 1. | Starbucks | ||
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Where you're going to end up if you get a master's degree in the following:
1) Art History 2) Fine Arts 3) Philosophy 4) Literature "I know the barista at this Starbucks: she was in my 'Critical Analysis of James Joyce' class in college!"
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| 2. | Starbucks | ||
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A major coffee chain that people obviously think is the devil's brew. Starbucks is apparently 'The Man' taking over the Earth. Naysayer: "I hate Starbucks! It's turning America into mindless clones!"
Me: "Dude, get over it. It's just coffee. Let me drink my frappuchino in peace." |
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| 3. | starbucks | ||
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Starbucks, also known as, crack for rich people. Junkie 1: Dude, my drug dealer got shot yesterday. What am I going to do?
Junkie 2: Lets go to Starbucks and get a Mocha. Junkie 1: No there's no way I could afford that. Junkie 2: I guess you'll just have to stick to inhaling cans of computer Dust-off again. |
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| 4. | starbucks | ||
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Despite what the "free thinkers" will tell you about how Starbucks is somehow going to take over the world (this isn't Austin Powers), their coffee is pretty good. I figured we would have learned our lesson from South Park. Jilly: Starbucks is so dumb. Only sheep go there.
Billy: Yes, I'm sure sheep would probably enjoy the taste of good coffee as well. |
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| 5. | starbucks | ||
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A widespread corporation that makes coffee, i don't care if it is 'the mans' way of drinking coffee, its is delicious. Granted, i don't like their stylings, like the smooth jazz playing in every branch, or the artsy fartsy stuff on the walls, or the names like decaf white chocolate bold mocha latte with cream, and then the description is, a bold, intriguing beverage, but i just like the coffee ex.1: some guy: dude, i can't believe you bought that £2 coffee from 'the corporation'
me: shut up and let me drink my coffee ex.2: me: what is a java mocha latte? clerk: it is an invigorating, intriguing, bold bevarage from the foothills of mexico me: does it taste good? clerk: uuuh i don't know ex.3: preppy scenester: oh, i love the smooth jazz stylings and intriguing art of this place (sips coffee) oh, this coffe is so smooth me: shut up and let me drink my coffee |
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| 6. | Starbucks | ||
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A clean and convenient coffee-related beverage provider that allows one to go get a consistently good cup of coffee no matter what town/airport you might be stuck in at the moment. Also, a delightful refuge from the hordes of "hometown" coffee shops run by people with bad attitudes who think they're too good for their jobs and intend to take that fact out on you for bothering to want a beverage served by them in the first place...
See also: A place that the average "Anti-popular-culture-trend-is" Spaz, likes to deride in large groups in order to clearly distinguish themselves from "The Man", "Yuppies," "Rich People", etc. Even though, they'd sell out in a second if they had a chance. Example: No matter where I travel, I'm always able to order my "decaf-iced-soy-latte" and know that they'll make it right, thanks to the good people at Starbucks.
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| 7. | starbucks | ||
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A chain that sells coffee and other coffee based products. I went to Starbucks and got coffee. Got a problem?
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