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1.
Your bed on Sunday morning. Where you mattress worship.

The "Name" of the church you say you attend on Sunday morning, when the truth is that you are just sleeping in.

What you say to "friends" that want you to attend church with them and you don't want to hurt their feelings - "I attend St. Mattress by the Springs".
Bob: Hey-Wanna go to church with me? You do attend somewhere don't you?

Thom: Sorry, can't go with you, I attend St. Mattress by the Springs, but thanks anyway.
by BeezerKR May 02, 2010