TV: In news today, a missing cat reappeared after 30 days…
IT Contractor: Man, I’ve hit a low, and there are crumbs everywhere.
Colleague: Good evening last night?
IT Contractor: Yeah, went out for a few drinks and made some new friends
IT Contactor (to self): Oh man, I was solitary bedcrumbing but can’t even admit it to myself, let alone anyone else.