look up any word, like blumpkin:
 
106.
A soccer mom is an overly-protective mother whose role is to live the life of a child herself. She is usually shallow, ill-informed, self-indulgent, insecure. She assumes that “family value” kids like hers can do no wrong. She has never elevated herself from the high school focus of being popular, being “seen”, being “cute.” Her role in life is to “fit in,” her “thinking” is “cliché driven,” she is “family value” focused, but has no real understanding about what the term means and would be at a loss to try to define it. She feels sorry for those who do not have soccer mom credentials, who have no suv, no children, no “fashionably family valued” family like hers. Her kids are an extension of herself, so she herself is a kid, and she molds them, transports them, educates them to think in the same shallow kid-like way she thinks. She is a “control freek” at heart with a mindset that is shallow and mindlessly routine. She doesn’t have the courage, the depth to express herself outside the “group think” of her soccer mom associates, for as in her high school days, she still seeks esteem from others by being popular, one of the gang. Wars, pestilence, poverty, the environment are issues that pass her by and always will. She is a robot, a child who has grown older but not wiser, an american dream tragedy culture has promoted, not having the depth to see or understand the sickness it has fostered.
by zetttt November 15, 2009
 
107.
noun.

Female with a strong type A personality with a skewed sense of civic responsibility coupled with a need to enforce political correctness on to others. Usually a hypocrite.

The term soccermom was not originally disparaging. It was used to refer to a Mom who takes her children as well as other children to their little league soccer game.

Soccermoms promote the following philosophies:

- winning is not important

- soccer is good because it is non violent

- no child should feel bad if they did not play well

- trophies awarded to every child

- removal of keeping score from the game

These philosophies are enforced in the brain of the soccermom to compensate for the fact that their kid does not play the game well.

Soccermom's are usually hypocrites as evidenced below:

- are vegetarians but cooks exotic dinners for the family that require eggs, fish and poultry

- believes in equality for all (but has no problem calling the driver ahead of her a 'chink' for cutting her off)
- supports PETA (enough said)
- supports Green Peace (but drives an SUV)
- a strong supporter of recycling only when convenient (if her blue box is full, the cans go in the garbage)

The worst soccermoms are the ones that have a bumper sticker on their SUV that reads: "IM A SOCCERMOM!"

Totally opposite of a Hockeymom

Soccermoms are the prime reason of cultural erosion in North America.
Billy: Hey can your Mom give me a ride to practice?

Johnny: Sure, I'll ask, she's taking 7 other kids too

Billy: Cool, she's a Soccermom, huh? Hey, does she still make you those rye and buckwheat sandwiches?

Johnny: ya, but I just throw them out

Billy: Yeah I would too. I got a steak in my lunch today.

Johnny: damn! That's cause your mom is a Hockey mom!

Billy: Yeah, my mom sets shit straight, unlike your Soccer mom!

Johnny (sobbing): yeeah..
by billyVandory February 14, 2010
 
108.
A womans so breasts are so saggy when she walks she hits them with her knees
i saw a brode walking across the lawn i thought she was a soccer mom player she was kicking her tits around.
by Chavela September 21, 2006
 
109.
A psychopath who is hell bent on enslaving her children and turning them into something they weren't as a kid. They freak out if you play games like Mortal Kombat, listen to ANYTHING that isn't their kid-friendly songs/remixes. They despise porn but yet most of them read Fifty Shades of Grey.

Their husbands are always regretting their marriage and turns to pleasing himself because his wife closed up shop years ago.
Person 1: So what music do you like?
Person 2 I like Linkin Park but-
Raging soccer mom: DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT NAME THEY ARE DEVIL'S MUSIC!! *Pushes kids aside*
Person 2: Shut the fuck up and go back to whatever hell hole you climbed out of you cunt!!!
Raging soccer mom:afsqgickiubervh,3:2:2$hhuwrfhiufew;78)feujkbvvsebevreubilvriun34;87);2 *Massive explosion*
Person 1: My god are they all like that?
Person 2: Yeah...
by Crazy915 October 17, 2012
 
110.
A progression from the shocker and surprise, but not quite the mini van. This consists of one up front with three little ones in the back.
After receiving the soccer mom, my girlfriend knew her destiny in life.
by spiralhelix June 21, 2011
 
111.
Definition #45 portrays very well how the "Soccer mom" lives/acts.They have that "better than you" attitude.Most enjoy the thrills of the filthy pirate and fish eye.
But that can be a good thing.
That prim n'proper soccer mom got hit with the filthy pirate!Dumb bitch!!
by big alien December 01, 2005
 
112.
Usually a very over protective parent. You can see them at game stored freaking out about games like "Mortal Kombat" or "Call of duty" very annoying and is the whole reason why anmies like DBZ have been so butchered.
Soccer Mom: How can you sell this game with all the blood you are all makeing seriel killers here!

Me: Oh my god I just came in to buy Dead Island!
by Bob the funky human October 16, 2011