Woman, normally 30-50, white, Always a Christian, kids are normally home-schooled due to secular filth telling them that you can be happy. If the kids go to public school they are beaten up regulary. Hates anything that can be violent, pornogreaphic, anti-jesus, or homosexual (a.k.a everything.) Enimies include The internets, Green Day, and any good form of Entertainment.
Me: *Listens to Green Day*

Soccer Mom: Why are you listening tho that unsaved trash, you are polluting my kids minds.

Me: Guess what I'm Gay! (always a good replent on these bitches)

*Soccer Mom flees*

Me: Stupid bloke.
by RandomInsanityIsAwesome November 13, 2006
Soccer moms usually are 40 year old ladys-- excuse me, whores who got knocked up by some douchebag. Most of the time they sign they're litle 12 year old kids to comunity center soccer legues, so they're rooms are filled with plastic trophies that kid doesn't care about. Soccer moms also have organizations that heavly support groups such as: RIAA, ESRB, Parental Advisory, Peta, Green-Peace and "WWF." Because of this support many things have been restricked from young audiences.

Soccer moms also drive shity SUV vehicles like Dodge Caravan's and Mercury, and what you will usually find in those cars are sports equipement, toys and other lame stuff.
If a poor child in Africa is starving to death blame it on the soccer mom down the street.
by SweanKimerson September 04, 2006
A soccer mom is typically a white suburban woman aged from 30-50. They are usually picking their kids up from school and driving them to the various activities they participate in. Usually seen with an SUV, a coffee and a cell phone yelling at someone. She owns a two-story house with her husband and two/three kids with a picket fence in the front yard. They are crazy Christians who believe that anyone or anything that isn't Christian is cursed by the devil. They blame rap/rock/metal music, the Internet and video games for all the problems in the world. They believe they are always right and that their opinion matters most. They are often seen telling others what to do. They are one of the people most responsible for the dumbing down of today's society. Her kids live a life planned for them. They have to get straight A's in school. They are forced to participate in soccer, hockey and many other sports. They are not allowed to watch any movies rated higher than PG. They are not allowed to play any video games, other than a Nintendo Wii for an hour a day. They have no Internet access, the computer is for homework only. After being forced to listen to Sheryl Crow, Shania Twain and Creed all of their life, they end up becoming rebels the moment they start high school. They do drugs, they get into fights, and start bullying others. Little does the soccer mom know that her perfect little daughter is fucking the captain of her school's football team. Soccer moms make me sick.
That soccer mom yelled at me because I was playing Metallica full blast! She said it was the creation of the devil...
by Marco K. May 27, 2010
Typically middle-class or upper middle class, white mothers that live in nice houses in the suburbs. Almost always a superficial christian of 30-45 years of age. Often proud, and super-dominant, because their husbands are successful.
Yet also tormented inside, because they know they're worthless and their lives are meaningless.

Has perfect, wonderful children that must be protected from everything that isn't christian, middle class and suburban.

She drives her children and often other kids around in a huge-ass SUV, suburban or minivan. Bad driving skills, and turns into a rude fucking bitch when you complain about their dangerous SHIT driving.

These fucking bitches cannot stand anything that isn't G-rated. That means 99.999% of music, movies, videogames and the internet are OUT. These women are the downfall of society. They pretend to be perfect and have perfect fucking little brat children, but are often cheating on their busy husbands, commiting adultery with other men, seeking whatever they think they don't have, and therefore destroying other families.

Self absorbed CUNT.
The fucking cunt soccer mom I saw driving through at McDonalds, yelling at everyone in front of her to hurry up because her huge-ass FAT FUCK children were hungry.
by airraid May 10, 2008
a sad woman who is trapped on a hamster wheel of endless running and running and running. (insert coffee chugging here) Her life revolves around her children's social schedule and her own existance is defined by it. Although the SUV is the surest indicator of her membership in this exclusive club, the latest identifier would have to be her multi-colored, quilted, flowery, overpriced, overstuffed purse that can double as a seat cushion for the bleachers of the soccer/baseball games. Usual habbitats, huge bargain warehouse stores, fast food lines, character themed pizza joints, and athletic fields. I was raised by one, and i will most likely (sadly) turn into one. The difference will be the censorship/racist/independence issues. Whether one is a Jewish soccer mom or christian or muslim....open mindedness is key. you know in your hearts that a 5 year old doesn't need to hear the word "fuck" all day long, he can do that when he's 15, but he should definately hear good ass music, and that shit should start in the womb. i know you all are young...and angry (mostly due to being cut off in traffic A LOT,) but when you have your own kids....you'll protect them from all of those fucking soccer mom's the same way they protect their kids from you.
day after day the soccer moms open thier eyes to begin another day of the exact copy of yesterday. coffee, turn on the Today show, drive kids to school, run over several small VW golfs, errands, sniff cocaine, pick up kids from school, stop at starbucks, take kids to soccer practice, go through drive thru, tuck kids into bed, masterbate and repeat daily until kids go to college.
by prisonerofsurburbia September 10, 2006
Homemakers who have a whole shitload of kids because they don't know how to use birth control and instead of working, they spend their weeks and summers shuttling them around in their death trap SUV's to their various activities. They're usually extremely protective when it comes to their kids and try to protect them in every way possible.
I refuse to become a soccer mom. I'm having two kids, total and they'll have one activity each.
by Jennifer Strong July 03, 2006
These women love their children and like to be "cool" with the kids. Usually they try and protect their kids from anything that may be evil.
Soccer moms wear khaki pants from the Gap.
by Anonymous July 18, 2004
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