A white middle or upper-middle class woman in her mid-20's to mid-40's with the following characteristics:

1. Her children usually have names like Zachary, Tyler, Kaitlin, Hannah, Hailey, or Dylan
2. Husband is a rather bland person that works as a family practice doctor, attorney, computers, selling pharmaceuticals, or other office drone.
3. Her children are always enrolled in at least 2 activities such as ballet, hockey, skiing, softball, and of course, soccer.
4. Favorite hobbies that don't involve her kids usually include drinking Starbucks, shopping at Kohl's or Old Navy, or gossiping with friends
5. Favorite restaurants are usually Chik-Fil- A, Taco Bell, Red Robin, and Chili's
6. Religious preference is usually Southern Baptist or Nondenominational Megachurch
7. They live primarily in California, Texas, Florida, Atlanta, D.C., Colorado, or Arizona suburbs
8. Vehicles driven are usually mid or large SUV's, Suburban's, or hatchbacks
9. Her children are either home schooled or attend a private or charter school
10. Her children are not allowed to watch PG-13 or R-rated movies, play any video games not rated E, play outside unattended, browse the internet without parental controls, or have contact with any adults outside of family, teachers, or coaches
Soccer mom
by waspcoloredstain June 13, 2013
An American bourgeois woman of the post baby boom generation, who, instead of reaping the benefits of the sexual revolution that her foremothers and sisters fought so hard for, sold out to the new patriarchy which promised stability in the form of white suburban neighborhoods, wordSUVwords, drive-through wordStarbuckswords and yearly trips on Carnival Cruise Line. The only dose of women's lib that transpired through their lifestyle is their endorsement of the the typically male dominated tradition of sport (usually soccer) onto their daughters. But don't be fooled - the fact that these women refer to themselves as "soccer MOMS" only reaffirms their sociological status as mere vessels for the incubation of their progeny.
I just got back from my high school reunion, and all the old cheerleaders are now lard-assed soccer moms.
by Anonymous July 23, 2003
Middle Aged Women who have no real purpose in life except to watch the kids and piss everybody else off. They are often seen in Wal-Mart.They are usually seen wearing Holiday-themed sweaters and shopping. They are allowed to bring there bad a$$ kids anywhere they want to,but if your listening to anything other than Radio Disneythey act bitchy and wanna act like they're your parents. Also seen driving unesssarily huge SUV. The only people who try to "Bargin" with there children, instead of disciplining them.
Man:*listening to Snoop Dogg*

Soccer Mom: Can you turn that ruckus down, there's children present.

Man:Turns down music slightly*

Soccer Mom: TURN DOWN THE MUSIC OR I'M GONNA TELL YOUR PARENTS!

Man: I'm a grown ass man

Soccer Mom: TURN IT DOWN NOW! *Gets in mans face*

Soccer Mom: *leaving*

Man: You know what they say..you can't teach an old bitch new tricks



Man: Get
by New Jerseyite August 21, 2004
An American mother living in the suburbs who spends most of her time driving her school-aged children from one athletic activity to another, often over scheduling them. Typically White, upper middle class, probably college-educated, most drive SUVs and talk on the cellphone while driving making them prone to cause traffic accidents.
Gigi is your classic Soccermom, she drives her SUV like a battle ship and I wouldn't want to be on the road next to her!
by OneBadAsp October 21, 2006
A burden to the human race, a scourge of humanity, a disgusting demon from Hell. The reason for such atrocities like the ESRB, v-chips, and the freakin' FCC. Soccer moms are a subspecies of humans, like monkeys and chimpanzees. They are often middle-aged and blonde, but they act like they're 20 and they often wear track pants to show of their disgusting hippo-ass that will make you vomit. They think their little, bratty, teeny boppers spawned from the radioactive shit from the asshole of Satan. Seriously, their kids are like demons! Soccer moms often force their offspring to do some sort of after school (soccer, baseball, football, etc.). Soccer moms also have very strict rules.
Me: *listening to Banana 101.5 in my Dad's car while he gets some smokes and beer*
Soccer Mom: You turn that awful garbage off this instant!
Me: *turns it up*
SM: TURN IT OFF YOU AWFUL MONSTER, MY CHILDREN ARE TO SPACES DOWN!!!
Me: Fuck you.
SM: *angry groan* YOU... YOU...*stomps off in anger*
Me: What a bitch.
by Valintino the Big Surpremo August 14, 2010
A bunch of repressive, middle to upper-class bitches. They always live in those Suburban neighborhoods, they are almost always a conservative republican, or conservative democrat. Soccer Moms are the reason for all of the useless censorship rules. They are snotty, rude, arrogant, and bitchy. They usually drive huge-ass SUVS, which they load their "precious, adorable, awesome, and better than everyone else" brat kids into every weekday for some kind of sport. A soccer-mom basically lives through her kids, she has them out doing all of the things she wanted to do as a kid. Her husband is never home, because his wife is such a repressive bitch, and won't have sex with him because she's afraid the kids will here them. Thus, he screws his secretary. A Soccer Mom will not allow her kids to watch any movies over the rating PG. She usually is involved with PTA meetings, and does snack days, is selective with who her kids can be around, and who they can't.
Soccer Moms fail.
by greenpeas August 19, 2009
1. The enemy of every gamer/anime fan out there.

2. Middle aged women who drive their kids around from school to activities in SUVs and have absolutely no driving skils. I mean reallly. They cause most of the accident on the roads. They also try to cancel anything that has a message, such as anime, music, internet sites, video games, and love. These fuckers really need to be shot.
Me: Yeah, so I was listening to Green Day the other day, and-

Soccer Mom: Don't say that name around my children! I'm telling your mothers!

Friend: What the...fuck off, we're talking here!

Soccer Mom: OHMYGOODNESSHOWDAREYOUSAYSUCHAWORDTOMEI'MGOINGTOGETEERYTHINGYOUKNOWANDLOVECANCELLEDANDTHEN-

Me:(Pulls out gun and shoots) Bitch. Now where's my Foamy the squirrel?!?!?!
by yoyobling October 13, 2004
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