If confronted by a Snooki be advised that you should cover your ears so you can't here it try to speak an english like language to lure you into it's mouth, and cover your eyes because due to it's small pea sized brain it will assume that if you can't see it, it can't see you.
Randy Marsh: What the hell is it?
Sizzler owner: They call it a Snooki, it's very famous.
Randy Marsh: Why?
Sizzler owner: I don't know!!!
Snooki: Snooki want smush-smush!
Mr. Stotch(Butters' dad): It's raping me!!!
Randy Marsh: Shoot it!!!
(guy shoots at Snooki with shotgun and misses)
(Snooki jumps out window)
Ex2: Kyle: What's that behind you?
Cartman: Nice try Kyle.
Kyle: No seriously, what is that?!
(Cartman turns around)
Cartman:Dude, What The Fuck Is That?!
Snooki: Snooki want smush-smush!!!
Cartman: GET IT OFF OF ME, IT'S RAPING ME!!!
Kyle: Oh god, guys get the hell out of here!
Kyle: Just get the hell out of here!
(Kyle transforms into Jersey alter-ego, Kylie-B)
Kylie-B: Get the fuck out of here ya piece of gahbage!
Snooki: (incoherent gibberish)
Kylie-B: You're muff cabbage! You got cabbage on your muff!
Snooki: (more incoherent gibberish)
(Kylie-B punches Snooki in the face)
(Snooki runs out crying)
Ex3: Mysterious Chinese Man: Remember, do not get your Snooki wet or feed it after midnight, unless you want it to turn into a Deena.
2. (v) The act of being punched in the face by a guido tool-bag.