Shia LaBeouf, known best for his roles in the Disney Channel show Even Stevens and in the motion picture Transformers, is a shapeshifting demi-god who is currently the greatest actor on the face of the earth. He was not born, but created in a rousing session of butt-sex involving Chuck Norris and Zeus, the god of thunder. In Greek his names means "The One Who Fucks Grizzly Bears", while in Latin it simply translates to " Big Dicked Moistener of Vaginas."

The first known historical evidence of Shia LaBeouf dates back to ancient Egypt. It is said that when Shia arrived in the country he immediately fucked all the hot Egyptian pussy. In fact, he fucked them so hard that they all died from internal bleeding. Furious, Shia created 10 plauges to spread across the country. He also freed the Jewish slaves and let them cross the red sea on his gigantic dick. Afterward he left the country and swore that from then on he would only pound chicks hard enough to make their vaginas bleed a little bit. This is the reason women now menstrate.

In the past he has taken on many names and identities. Some of these include Hercules, King Arthur, William Shakespeare, General William Tecumseh Sherman, Walter Cronkite, Smokey the Bear, James Earl Jones, Ted Nugent and Samuel L. Jackson. This does not include the people that Shia himself created. Some examples would be Ron Jeremy, who was forged from a wart on Shia's dick and Michael Moore, who was spawned from a giant shit Shia once took.

Shia's best scientific achievement is easily curing polio. He did this by putting his jizz in a syringe and injecting it into an infected woman. He didn't know she had polio, he just wanted to inject his seamen into her. He is also credited with punching a hole through the ozone layer with his left testicle. His right testicle is responsible for creating the Grand Canyon.

Shia first appeared in his current form in 2000 as Louis Stevens on Even Stevens. Since then he has starred in several amazing films such as Transformers, Disturbia, Eagle Eye, and Holes (which ironically enough was the name of a porn he did under another one of his pseudonyms, Peter North).

Today Shia still roams the earth pounding hot chicks and eating live hand grenades. In fact, I believe that he is currently banging you mom/sister/wife/girlfriend.


Shia LaBeouf has a gigantic dick.

Shia LaBeouf is the greatest actor in the history of actors.
by FannyFondler December 30, 2008
The exact moment where you are taking a shit and you fart simultaneously.
I had some mean curry last night. Do you have a toilet brush? Because that toilet needs a serious scrub after my messy Shia Labeouf
by tzchworbus February 26, 2014
Shia, Shia, Shia. Only one of the hottest actors ever!

*His name means "Thank God for beef"
Favorite Quote: What's living if you never pull down your shorts and slide down the ice?
by Andie Featable December 25, 2003
The HOTTEST disney actor who ever lived.
by CanadianChild May 17, 2003
being cute smart nice and great actor
whoa! that guy is so shia!
by Lillian December 04, 2003
the hottest guy ever. my future husband.
he looks like a shia labeouf!
by offthetopofmyhead June 28, 2003
asshole
1. Hey! That guy is a total Shia Labeouf!

2. Shia Labeouf!

3. Shia Labeouf is a Shia Labeouf.

4. Shia Labeouf's parents are Shia Labeoufs for giving him such a hard ass name to spell twenty times over!
by Lorelai Parker November 04, 2009

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