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1.
The revolutionary way to teach women how to give proper handjobs.
"Designed specifically for women, in just six minutes a day, you can get arms you'll be proud to show off."

"The Shake Weight is only 2 and a half pounds, virtually unbreakable, and is guaranteed for life."
by OgnarPliskin January 17, 2010
 
2.
A tool to practice giving handjobs.. With one or two hands
Husband: OMG baby that was the best handjob ever!!
Wife: Thanks honey, ive been using the shake weight
by thecoolestjewyouwishyouknew July 23, 2010
 
3.
shake weight - sexual act: to stroke another person's penis for sexual pleasure.
She wouldn't give me head, just a shake weight.

We only had time for a shake weight in the car on the way to the show.
by Daniel T. Anderson January 01, 2011
 
4.
A work-out device, believed to be bogus, that when used by a woman, according to South Park, helps them give the greatest old-fashioned (handjob)
Sharon works her talking shakeweight
Shakeweight: Harder, better, faster stronger
(dings, squirts out water)
Sharon: auhhhh
by Adidar23 December 01, 2010
 
5.
An alternative phrase to "air jerk", meaning the same thing, but able to be said in mixed company or situations in which air jerk would seem crass. The definition is taken from using a shake weight that you shake up and down, similar to the air jerk motion.
Dave to the plumber: "Why didn't you show up yesterday?"

Plumber: "I had upgrade my cell phone, my contract was up."

Dave: "Shake Weight!"
by Caroline43001 May 26, 2010
 
6.
Not to be confused with the vibrator, I mean dildo, I mean workout assistant, shakeweight refers to the excess ground marijuana that's left in the grinder because it won't fit into the fatty when rolling a joint. In an ideal joint rolling sesh, there would be no shakeweight because the roller of the j knows what he's doing. Shakeweight only accumulates when a gross overestimation was made, resulting in excess ground weed left in the grinder that can't fit into the joint.
bogart: i have so much extra weed that i can't fit into this joint. I don't know what to do...should I just keep the extra weed in my grinder?
bro: only retards carry along shakeweight
bogart: I'm so new to marijuana, I just don't know how much I can pack into a j
bro: bogart, when will you learn?
bogart: i need some poon
by cohencock November 23, 2011
 
7.
verb, noun, -shake weighting, -shake weight

-verb (shake weighting, shake weight)
1. to talk about another person in awe.
2. to kiss up to another person.
3. to be on someone's 'jock'.

-noun (shake weight)
1. an ignorant person
-verb examples
1. Even though the man was twice the player's age, he was shake weighting him for his autograph.

2. Some people like to shake weight other people that outclass them.

-noun examples
1. Don't listen to that clown, he's just a shake weight.

Origin:
R. Santana by way of Tenth-Rick.
by Tenth-Rick October 20, 2010