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1.
While the distance travelled by light in a year (a "light year") is a significant measurement, there is one that has greater relevance to most of us: the "shag mile".

The shag mile (noun) is the distance one is prepared to travel in order to have sex.
Imagined SMS exchange*:

A: I am quite enamoured with you.

B: I feel rather passionately disposed towards you.

A: If only...

B: ...we weren't so many shag miles apart?

A: Yes, but it's a measure of my deep-seated lust for you that I will travel around 150 shag miles to see you.

B: I'll be waiting on the bed with my kit off.

*The real exchange would be considerably fruitier than this
by Roo October 06, 2013