Once ruled and founded by Witchfinder General Lord Boof in 1609; Shasten school is situated on an isolated hilltop (known to locals as Shasten). Much like Azkaban, Shasten School is a high security institution for the most enchantingly gifted pupils from the godforsaken province of North Dorsetshire. Every year the institution sends several students to the poverty stricken nation of Rwanda where they can take advantage of the dire misfortune of others in order to gain something sycophantically cringeworthy to put on their personal statements and CV's alike. Shaftesbury school students can be differentiated from Sturminster Newton
students by a distinct lack of webbed feet.
Notable alumni include; Paddington Bear, Tony Bear, and much loved Shakesperian villain Iago.
PUPIL 1: Is it your first day here?
PUPIL 2: Yes?
PUPIL 1: Boarder or local?
PUPIL 2: Local.
PUPIL 1: Well Frightfully sorry sir, it makes no difference - welcome to the mad house!
ANONYMOUS STUDENT: What school do you go to?
SHASTEN PUPIL: Shaftesbury School.
ANONYMOUS STUDENT: Could be much worse, could be Gillingham
SHASTEN LOCAL 1: Those Shasten school students are a most peculiar bunch.
SHASTEN LOCAL 2: Yes... Quite!