Scottish Whale is a term derived from the whales that inhabit the Atlantic near the coast of Scotland. These whales used to have strange mating calls and performed coitus in a very peculiar way, so Scottish Whale originally applied to a guy that was good in bed, yet was a very interesting partner. Today scottish whale refers to a sexual act involving an accordian, a two headed zebra, a case of 409 cleaning solution, and a life-size cut-outs of the entire Hepburn family. This sexual act is considered by many sexologists and sexy people to be the most expensive sexual act to date, costing ten times as much as the more well known Mexian Marmalade
Roberto was tired of having sex in an ordinary way, so he asked his partner if she would like to commit to a Scottish Whale. She agreed, so now Roberto and Wanda-Zim moonlight, and have been for 47 years hoping to, one day, afford a true Scottish Whale. Roberto is a closet homosexual and confessed this to Wanda-Zim so they split up and Roberto continues his quest with Jimmy-Sue Miller.
by Dr. JM Buck July 31, 2004