A true Italian man beast with at least six illegitimate children. He likes all women, some men, and the occasional animal. He is known for his expressions and loud noises, often of the hilarious variety. He plays drums in marching band, but still impregnates at least 4 girls a weekend, then encourages most of them to get abortions.
"Hey Saucy Butterpants want to go to a movie this Friday night?"
"I would like to but I have to work to provide child support for my many kids. Also, I have to fashion a tool used for abortions from a clothes hanger."