Ted: "I wish I was as awesome as you."
Hanson: "Nothing in my future life will ever measure up to the sheer awesomeness of that moment. Kill me now"
Ted (lifting hammer): "Gladly, my friend."
Recieving a handjob when the person giving the handjob has sand stuck to their hand
A painful handjob
"Yeah man i heard he got a Sandjob."
"rumor has it that his dick was sore for a week"