1 - be incredibly ugly with little or no teeth
2 - be pregnant by the time they are 17, unmarried and unaware who the father could be,
3 - wear Rangers football shirts and gold chains (from Argos)
4 - smoke while pregnant! preferably Regal kingsize
5 - be a heroin addict (preferably whilst pregnant)!
6 - wear 15 sovereigns on their fingers at all times.
7 - shout and swear in the street, even at their own children
8 - wear their slippers to the off licence to buy Buckfast
9 - be on benefits (otherwise you are considered posh)
10 - get a coloured tattoo on their ankle of a dolphin, rose or Winnie the Pooh.
11 - be called Carolann, Chelsea, tammy-Lee, chantelle, chanel, Diane, lee, Kelsey, etc etc
12 - name their child Paris, Jordan, keyliegh, lesley-ann etc etc
13 - decorate their house with the following; sofa from DFS with leather puffy arms, floral wallpaper to clash with the floral carpet to clash with the floral curtains and dado rail - all different types of pattern. the bedroom must be lilac and silver themed with wall paper peeled off one wall.
1 - be the ugliest, scariest looking blokes you've ever seen, also with little or no teeth
2 - have tattoos with some skank's name like "Carolann" or "Lee-ann" across their upper arm indicating "true love"
3 - beat their wives/girlfriends
4 - fight in the street after pub closing time
5 - the minute the sun comes out take their tops off and show their disgustingly scrawny bodies to the world, track marks included.
6 - be heroin addicts
7 - drive their crap cars whilst sitting so far back and low down it appears they have removed the front seat and are in fact driving whilst sitting in the back
8 - must like crap techno music like Bonkers
9 - punch walls when their latest 15 year old girlfriend breaks up with them (probably cause she's on benefits and figures she'll get more money and a better house if she claims to be on her own.
10 - generally be scum
Tour guide "not really, just round that corner is The RapTap and it's the biggest shithole known to man".