| 1. | Pseudophilassity | ||
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Derived from the greek roots "pseudo" and "phil". Pseudo meaning false, and phil meaning love. Pseudophilassity is a condition in which someone unexpectedly grows affectionate towards a person they hate (typically an ass/asshole, hence the "-ass-" in Pseudophilassity). The stages of Pseudophilassity Include: Stage 1: You recognize that you have a searing hatred for the person, yet you feel the need to talk to them, and can associate your feelings for them closely to the effects an addict exhibits. Stage 2: They begin conversations with you, followed by many insults, using your reactions as entertainment before impolitely asking that you leave. Stage 3: At this stage, the illness has progressed to an irrevocable level. You can't deny that you have affectionate feelings for said person, amidst your mingling hatred for them. Stage 4: You're royally fucked. Treatments and Cures: There are no known instant cures for Pseudophilassity. After some time, the body's defenses will overcome the illness, although moving to a different continent may in some cases help the healing process. Anna: Ugh, I can't stand him, yet I HAVE to talk to him. I don't know why!
Mary: Oh no, Anna, I think you have Pseudophilassity!! Anna: Fuck my life. Mary: Welcome to my world. |
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