A bi-annual night of stress, guilt and recrimination where stressed out/ tired teachers who have spent the night frantically marking books converse with defensive / stressed parents who feel like they're being judged.
Parent's often don't let on who's mum and dad they are so teachers play a strange kind of guessing game trying to work out which of their pupils could be spawned by this combination of people.
They also can't risk calling them by the same surname of their children as theres a pretty good chance they're different.
Teachers try to be diplomatic and vague whilst parents want answers.
5 hours into a normal Parents' Evening
Teacher: Good Evening. I'm Mr. Blake.
Teacher: You must be here to talk about...
4 minutes later
Teacher: (still not 100% who's parent this is)...so definate progress has been made which is pleasing and bodes well for next year...
Parent: (None the wizer but pleased they've not been called bad parents to their faces) Thanks
Teacher: (Lying) Feel free to drop by at any time if you have any concerns.
Parent: (Lying) Thanks I will.