An Orchid Widow - is similar to other types of widows - golf widows, football widows, A woman married to a man obsessed with orchids, growing them, looking at them, talking to them etc. Only the Orchid Widow is not a seasonal widow - the Orchid Widow is a permanent condition lasting all year long, but frequently peaking in the spring and fall when festivals and shows that can be held on the other side of the planet are occurring. The Orchid widow will get a glazed look on her eyes while she listens to her husband or significant other describe plants and their characteristics in great boring detail. The Orchid Fanatic will have long ruined any interest that the wife may have had for orchids years ago, her interest being overwhelmed by the males obsessive behavior and abnormal interest in flowers.
Yes, I heard she had become an orchid widow. But she took care of it when she put all his orchid plants in the driveway, covered them with kerosene and dropped a match. And in case you were wondering, they are divorced now.
by illyria illyar October 21, 2011

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