NPHS is actually bearable, despite it's forever over crowded main hall and revolving door of new teachers. Yes, there are many things wrong with New Paltz High School. Like the horrible, semi-retarded, out of sync cheer team (being new doesn't give you an excuse for looking like crap), the ridiculous school wide drama (even the emo kids have it), and excess of over-achievers.
But at the same time, we have some really chill teachers, a general lack of cliques (we're unified by our appreciation of pot), and fucking awesome cookies.
The academics at NPHS are supposed to be top notch. But seriously we're not that smart. It's just that the midget principal forces us to take as many APs as possible. When we realize that we're fucked we all just end up cheating off of eachother. Despite us being immature assholes, some of the teachers are really cool. Foti can kiss my ass but Diana and Espinosa are really great teachers and ridiculously funny (even moreso when taken out of the classroom).
The kids at NPHS are melodramatic and bitchy. We're all pretty hot, friendly, and horny, so that starts a lot of fights. Because we have such a lack of cliques, it just means that the girls fuck around with more guys and the guys scratch their balls with more guys. Everyone's really tight with eachother because most of us have known eachother for thirteen long motherfucking years.
The food is well.... crappy. But that's really not a surprise. The only food the cafeteria offers is ridiculously unhealthy (curly fries with nacho cheese WTF?!?!?) but they have a terrible salad bar and use that to defend the shit food. Not that it doesn't taste good. It tastes awesome because of all the oil and lard they put in it. Hello, chocolate chip cookies. Seriously, the student body is one when it comes to our love of the school's under cooked cookies.
Extra curriculars? Well everyone does a sport because we're all preppy MOFOs. The XC team fucking beasts, which makes up for our crappy football and basketball teams. As for clubs... they exist? We have a ton of clubs because teachers get paid extra if they supervise a club, but they're all pretty pointless. Environmental club makes bad videos about recycling all year to be broadcasted on NPZ, the newspaper is basically comprised of two cut-throat girls, and book club? Book club is made up of ghost members.
"Those potheads in front of the Muddy Cup aren't from SUNY, they go to New Paltz High School."
"The bitches at New Paltz High School will suck your cock dry."
"New Paltz High School doesn't have enough gay kids."
If you go to New Paltz High School you are one or more of the following:more...
-a ridiculous perfectionist (I know twelve girls off the top of my head who are in 5 clubs and taking 4 AP classes)
-a proud slut (OHEMGEE GUYS LOOK GOSSIP GIRL WROTE ABOUT HOW BEVIN DUMPED ME BEFORE XMAS BECAUSE HE ONLY WANTED MY VAG!!!)
-a burnt out pothead (Yes, burned out before graduation. Kids smoke up before school, in school, and after school with our teachers. You'd be smoked out too)
-in hiding (If you want to survive, you hide)
-"ghetto" (Your skin may be black, and sure, you wear Baby Phat but let's face it... YOU LIVE IN NEW PALTZ)
The rules in NPHS are a joke. It's basically, don't piss people off and you can do whatever the hell you please. I skip most classes and just go into the study halls or leave campus, and most others do the same. You can get away with this because the Assistant Principal spends all his time caressing a motherfucking banana and the hall monitors throng outside the gym and gossip.
Most of the teachers realize how much of a joke New Paltz High School is and are as apathetic as we are about the whole situation. Here are a few examples of the shit we get though:
English Teacher likes to scream about phallic symbols in Hamlet (there are none, but English Teacher is an excellent demonstration of many of Freud's theories) and SAT words. It's only tenth grade English, but you're a fucking idiot if you don't have 800 of them memorized by now. The best way to deal ...
New Paltz Highschool.. The asisstant principle walks around with a banana in his hand 24/7 grilling kids cause he thinks hes intimidating & the Principle herself is about 4'9 and looks like Wee Man. Rumor in the school is that the athletic director, a full blown lesbian has a relationship with the principle herself to. The school consist of only about two ghetto kids..the rest are either flaming gays, mentally retarted, dungeon and dragon nerds, dumb over egoed jocks,sleezy sluts and potheads. Drama revolves all around the school, theres even a gossip girl page on myspace so people can keep up with it all.
A day in New Paltz High School.. The thing's you'd hear.
Slut: Hey, did you see that stuff about me on gossip girl! im so proud of myself!
Jock: Yeah, i dont know how you managed to fuck all 13 of those guys in a night.
Nerd 1: Man that girl on gossip girl is awsome.
Nerd 2: Yeah! i'd play in her dungeon allday!.
Gay Kid 1: Hey why don't you come play dungeons and dragons with us?
Gay Kid 2: Yeah.. come play with us.. *Smiles*
Asisstant Principle: *Pulls out banana & sucks on it*
Asisstant Principle: I hope there not watching this.
Pothead: Whoaa... is that a dildo in his mouth?.