Trad. Scottish, although I'm sure they'll have penetrated other parts of the world by now. Contrary to popular belief, they are NOT only found in Glasgow, although that's where they are most common. I live in Edinburgh and ewe have plenty of them, yay. There are two forms - Male, known as a Ned, and Female, known as a Ned/ette.
Both sexes of Neds wear tracksuit bottoms, a cheap version of an expensive brand bought at the local market. These can be any bright colour, but normally white. These in turn are tucked into white socks, with brand name trainers. Hoodie or shell suit worn on top. Females wear about 10 tacky "gold" (that turns green) rings on each hand at an average count, along with large gold earrings. Normally also hair in a ponytail so tight it looks as if the scalp should be pulled off. Males tend to have a shaved head, although not always. NEVER HAVE LONG HAIR. Normally the head is covered by a burberry cap anyway. Always carrying a knife, mobile phone which they'll have nicked from somewhere, fags, and generally some cheap booze.
Nedettes wear the absolute minimum of clothing, but also with the tacky gold jewellery. Also known as a slut.
p.s they also wear rockports (big clunky boots).
Standing on street corners/outside a chippy in a large group (crew) normally of about 20, although this can vary. They shout abuse at random people who walk past (I take the long route home at night!) and whether the person responds or not, will then chase them and "knife" the poor person. They spend the rest of the time sticking the middle finger up at random people and buses, tring to look "pure shcmental" (cool), drinking cheap cider at £1.50 a 2 litre bottle, smoking, stealing from people, and getting pregnant from the age of 12.
They hate anyone who is not a ned, but esp. punks and goths.
They live in council houses with mothers that are wasters even more than themselves. If the father is still there (very occasionally) he's probably an alcoholic who spends all day watching football. Live off the dole. They generally end up in a Young Offenders Institute before most kids know what that is. The continued influence in their lives is that of their Parole Officer, whom they probably see from the age of two.
Females of the species are bright orange from the three inch layer of cheap foundation that they plaster on. They are either very fat or very thin. Males are generally quite thin, although the occasional fat one does creep up. Every second word is either
b)a word which is meant to be offensive but you can't quite make out what it is
They never speak in proper English. No-one can understand them except their fellow neds. They skive from school until they either have no schools left to be thrown out of, or until they can legally leave and let the rest of us have some peace. They then get a grant to go to beauty schoola dn leave their numerous kids in a creche, or go stand in the dole queue.
I don't think it needs to be said that they all go to public high schools and make life miserable for the rest of us.
If you ever come across a gang of them, RUN. And cross your fingers. If they catch you, have fun looking after the stab wounds. If you find one on his/her own, they will proabably run from you, as they're all complete cowards without backup, alcohol, and a knife. :)
"Yer like, a pure schmental bam an a' that. Eh, whut ya doin wi ma burd ya ******* *******. Ye wantin a fite aboot that?? Aye, wul come oan then, ah'll pure smash ye an that..." I'm sure you get the idea.
You're an idiot. What're you doing with my girlfriend you ******* *******. D'you want a fight about that?? Well, come on then, I'll beat you!"
SAVE AN INNOCENT, KILL A NED!!!!!
Non - educated delinquent Scottish Chav. Different accent ... simular clothing and same attitude.
Normal Person: Hello
Normal Person: ?
Ned: Aye pure dingy man am no a ned!!
Normal Person: m'kay.
A Ned is a Non Educated Delinquent. They are usually in groups of about 10-20 and call themselves "Teams, Fleetos and Bundys". They are all weak and only "fight" in groups and by "fight" i mean "slashing or "chibbing" or using any other instrument other than their fists. Dress-sense-wise most have a Berghaus jacket (usually stolen from someone they have attcked) complete witha burberry hat tuned to the moon and bright white socks pulled over joggers covered in "bommers". A "bommer" being a small hole burned from smoking hash in a joint. Female nedettes referred to as Sengas are pretty much the same although they have 5 rings on average on each finger complete with fake gold earrings. They hang around the streets looking for a fight , stealing cars and drinkin cheap booze usually "buckie" or the really poor, "Merrydown" or even a cheap bottle of cider costing about £1.50 a litre. They have poor vocabulary , usually because the dropped out of school at the age of 12. Unemployed little "hairies" their mothers couldn't care less about them as they're usually herion addicts themselves. No life ahead of them except alcholism , abuse and homelessness.
" Wit u fuckin lookin it ya fuckin fanny ? "
"Am gonny chib you ya dafty ! "
" ... Fleeto numba wan , runnin the show ! "
The epitome of obnoxious youth, to be found hanging around in parks, on street corners and outside the local 'offie' or dealer's house waiting to buy cheap cider, buckie or resin.
Pastimes include beating up strangers, meeting their parole officer and drinking afore-mentioned cider or buckie.
Generally attired in fake burberry cap tilted skywards, trackie bottoms tucked into football socks and a variety of fake gold "sovvies". In the case of the female of the species, this is accessorised by a roll of fat cut in two by a high-rise thong, 17 fake gold hoops in each ear and a screaming, ugly toddler to which she gave birth at the age of 13.
Favourite phrases include 'awrite, ya bam', 'Ah'm gonnae kick yer cunt in' and 'are youse lookin' fur a fight?'
"I was innocently walking down the street when a ned threw an empty buckie bottle at my head."
Scots : A young waster who lives in the Glasgow area; a hooligan; a gang member, with skip cap, tracksuit and socks tucked into trainers. Poss. from "Non-Educated Deliquent"
"Ah'm no a ned"
the male: usually very thin, wearing a berghaus jacket, trakies tucked into socks, cheap(fake) lacoste trainers, hair that looks like it could land a plane, uaually stoned and drunk(oot der heed man) and would shag anything with a pulse as long as she is a nedette
the female: either very fat or very thin, face that has been plastered with a brand of foundation that has been produced from the tango factory, wearing very little clothes that show off the eight month old bump, wearing three or more fake gold rings on every finger, at least two 3" thick chains sportin someone elses name and usually found on the end of a male neds cock.
similarities: are usually found standing on random street corners drinking cheap alcohol called buckfast or md 20-20, every second word is fuck or some other random word that is intended to offened but no one knows what it means
look at dat big mad scary goff man, am gonnae chibb u ya baw, aye a fucked yer maw last night n she wis luvin it man
A Scottish term for the often uneducated and invariably aggressive teenagers found throughout Britain. Identified by gold jewellery (especially sovereign rings), baseball caps, white trainers and/or Kappa/Burberry branded clothing. The name is thought to derive from 'Edward', as in teddy boy. It is in no way an acronym for "non-educated delinquent", which is in any case ungrammatical.
"A bunch of wee neds broke in last week and vandalised the place."
Northeast Drunk. An alcoholic resident/semi-transient denizen of Northeast Minneapolis.
They once thundered across the post-industrial Nordeast wasteland in great numbers, but gentrification and the closing of Sully's bar have severely curtailed their numbers in recent years.
Typified by the wearing of trucker caps, having of grimy beards, nicotine stained fingers, and less than optimal dental counts.
Northeast has a long and storied drinking tradition, but the beginning of the modern NED era can be traced to the closing of the Grain Belt Brewery in 1976.
NED :"I used to work at the Grain Belt Brewery. I'm waiting for the place to open up again so I can get my job back."
Me, on bus:"Didn't that place close like 30 years ago? And isn't it now a library and condominium?"
NED:"They can make it a brewery again."
ME:"Well, good luck."
NED:"Spare anything for some Natural Ice?"