look up any word, like cleveland steamer:
 
1.
Pleasuring oneself with the feet, whilst swinging in a tyre.
I'm off home for a banana, a few nuts and a monkey wank.
by Borthers February 20, 2007
 
2.
when you knock one out whilst up a tree.

eg i got bored last night so i climbed a tree and had a monkey wank
by lokimike September 09, 2008
 
3.
The act of masturbating whilst making loud monkey noises, such as 'ooooh eeeh ah ah ah oooh ahh ahhh!'
''Christy was screaming last night in his room. I think he was having a monkey wank!''
by PdizDog November 27, 2011
 
4.
1. A situation note entirely going the desired way.

2. Of something which is totally useless.
As the chief engineer watched the new bridge come crashing down on its first opening plunging 100 cars and occupents into the river below, he was heard to comment "This is turning into a pile of stale monkey wank"
by Norbert Colon October 15, 2004