A Minecraft Noob is a person who plays Minecraft for the first time. Signs of being a Noob include the following:

-Thinking a 16-bit game is shit
-Not knowing what to do when you first spawn
-Thinking Minecraft Creepers and Ghasts are cute and approaching them
-Finding lava and thinking it's diamonds
-Thinking redstone is ruby
-Spending more than a minute punching stone
-Digging sand or gravel directly above you
-Being distracted by the music playing and not realizing mobs behind you
-Building a house out of dirt, sand, or gravel
-Attempting to pet a wolf
-Entering a cave without torches
-Walking past iron ore and coal

And many more