A company that does everything they can to make sure your getting punked' and they're not.
Many people are familiar with there surreptitious products and their unfaithful outlook towards their customers
- Xbox Live
-The Red Ring Of Death and its "E-" relatives
- The Blue Screen of Death
- Buggy software
- The extra layer of plastic on Point Cards
- Activation of the Point Cards only when you get to the check register
Microsoft Customer: <That's ironic my Xbox died on my 16th birthday. I bought it 2 years ago for my 14th birthday>
<Well, my warranty is gone but I guess I'll call customer support and see if they can do anything about it... or maybe>
*Goes to Google and types in: how to use your Xbox controller to play PC games*
<Yes YES YESS!! Finally, this is great...now I just have to... huh??..... "Step: 4 Ok, just purchase a Microsoft wireless receiver or the Microsoft Xbox 360 Wireless Controller for Windows
<WHAT!? ARE YOU KIDDING ME??
Curse you Microsoft!!!! >
Organisation bent on world domination masquerading as a software company.
See also Bill Gates; Windows
Fucking shit Microsoft programs
See World Domination
A large terrorist organisation, hell bent on producing software that crashes and works slowly. Some of their more evil tactics over the years include waiting until just before you click the save button to make the screen go all blue for no reason, but more subtle tactics include waiting until you start to work, then annoying you with a sodding paper clip.
Josh: "I'll just get on with some work..."
Microsoft Paperclip: "Hello!"
Josh: *I'll just ignore him, and he'll go away*.... *starts to type*
Microsoft Paperclip: "Do you want to write a letter?"
Microsoft Paperclip: "Okay, do you need some help with that?"
Josh: "NO! NO! NO I DONT FUCKING WANT SOME HELP! PISS OFF!!"
*clicks on hide, paperclip dissapears*...*begins to work...*
... 2 minutes pass ...
Microsoft Paperclip: "Hello!"
An obvius copy of Macrohard, which Bill Gates stole the disk of while I was sleeping. He also copied my program Doors, and renamed it Windows.
Bill Gates: I'll just take this disk... *yoink*
Me: You, come back here right now, or I will personally come all the way over there and call Ronald F***ing McDonald to kick you in the nuts!
Bill Gates: hehehe *escapes* I'll just change the name to Microsoft, and this program to Windows, and no one will ever know!!!! WAHAHAHA!!!!
Me: Cheap B******!
A company most famous for its satirical "operating system," Windows. A sort of play-on-code from genuine operating systems, Windows amuses millions with its cartoonishly-dated gui (graphical user interface), Gerald Ford-esque clumsiness (whoops! I froze again! *laugh track*), hyper-zealous licensing scheme, and utter lack of usability. For these reasons and many others Windows popularity remains very high.
And why shouldn't spyware be able to install itself on my computer?!
The bane of civilization
Damn all other systems to hell for not being able to overtake Windows as the dominant OS on the market.
An inferior product that is out to rule the world.
Microsoft's plans for building a death star device was shut down by officepax.