It's a state of bitter, cocksure alcoholic former blue-collar laborers who can't find decent jobs because Michigan is an economic black-hole. It snows alot, and when it doesn't snow it's extremely fucking hot or ball-shrinkingly cold. Crime runs rampant in its urban centers and life just plain sucks in its small towns due to boredom. There are a lot of lakes, dunes and forests, but people from Michigan couldn't give two fucks about them because they are everywhere, and Michiganders have better things to do like drink and worry about paying bills they have no money for. Naturally, morons from out of state flock in droves to look at things that really aren't that interesting.
Michiganders are divided into two groups: Michiganders and Yoopers. Michiganders are like as described before. Yoopers are essentially Canadians, and basically not human. The only thing a Michigander hates more than other Americans and foreigners are Yoopers. Yoopers are too stupid and inbred to consider hating anyone else because they live happy-go-lucky lives as lumberjacks and have sex with their sisters and occasionally a beaver. Yoopers are very proud of themselves despite having little to be proud of, and call southerners "trolls" because they live "under da bridge, don'tcha know." Michiganders seethe with rage about this, but can't do anything about it because the logic is infallible in a retarded sort of way, and also beating up a Yooper is much like striking a child; fun, but frowned upon.
Michigander: "What the fuck are you so happy about?"
Californian: "I live in a state with nice weather and jobs."
Michigander: "Go fuck yourself!"
Yooper: *unintellible sing-songy nonsense that sounds like Canadian*
Michigander: "Goddamn Yoopers."
1. The state where you can have 70 degrees and sun one day and a snowstorm the next.
2. A state where you can't keep a job because everything's either downsizing or moving to mexico.
Michigan... I'm unemployed and cold... wheeeee!!
a place where your horoscope is correct more often than the weather channel
"independence day fireworks have been canceled due to heavy snow and low visibility"
The state that is shaped like a boxing glove. Makes sense because that state kicks ass. Largest city is Detroit, which is well over 80% black. Is followed in population by Grand Rapids.
Michigan Artists: Kid Rock, Eminem, Taproot, Andrew W.K., lead singer of New Radicals, Madonna.
The state consisting of two seasons; winter and construction.
Nobody should live or pass through Michigan
A.) A fairly decent state to live in, although the lack of jobs.
2.) An excellent college football team that never seems to have a losing season.
D.) Where snow is not a big deal in May.
4.) A place with a decent music scene.
E.) Mexico's biggest fan, seeing as every company decides to move there.
A.) Yeah, Michigan's not bad, except I'm getting laid off next week.
2.) The Michigan Wolverines are number 5. Again.
D.) "Hello, it's May 3rd. today was a beautiful day, 75 and sunny. Tomorrow there's a slight chance of snow and highs in the twenties."
4.) "Did you check out that new band from Grand Rapids, Still Remains?"
"Yeah bro. They're so xmetalx. Woot."
E.)"2,000 jobs will be lost as yet another company moves down to Mexico, where they can pay workers 1/6th what they pay them now."
1. a swing state for presidential elections...yeah, we matter!
2. consists of 2 peninsula's...yes, TWO. the u.p. is equally a part of michigan.
3. is not called the wolverine state because of the presence of wolverines...but because of their commitment and working like "wolverines" during the cold war.
4. state with some sweet colleges.
5. yeah, it's cold, but we like it!
6. we got all great lakes around us. beautiful, beautiful.
7. one word...pistons
8. we got the nimrods.
9. potholes-yes...unemployment? yes...
10. no state can be perfect, there are flaws, but michigan is an awesome state!
1. we vote democratic most of the time though.
2. the u.p. has the best stories.
3. we work hard, & it shows
4. michigan tech, central, concordia, ferris, michigan state, nmu, u of michigan (oldest state college in u.s.)
5. that's why you get complimentary gloves when you enter the lower peninsula.
6. if you stay anywhere in michigan, you are within 85 miles of a great lake.
7. so what if they didn't win the championship, they still got 2nd, they were defending champs and they lost in game 7, GAME 7!!
8. also, the bessemer speedboys and the kingsford flivvers were on the list for espn's high school names.
9. yeah, so what
Best state in the country.