One of the United States of America, 26th in the Union, with the longest freshwater shoreline in the entire world. Also, a person is never more than 6 miles from a natural water source, nor 85 miles from one of the Great Lakes. And most importantly, despite our tendency to truncate words, our accent forms what is called the "General American" dialect, or the one considered accent-less by the most people (although we do have some fun with words). Apparently, for people who can't spell, there are 23 different ways the residents of our state choose to spell its name. For what truly defines this state, I refer you below:
In MICHIGAN we have two seasons: WINTER, and CONSTRUCTION. 60 degree TEMPACHUR is occasion for shorts, T-shirts, and maybe a swim. We head UP NORTH to THE COTTAGE, which is anywhere north of the state's middle. The cottage is either some disintegrating cabin in the middle of BFE where we go to play EUCHRE, get drunk and THEN shoot deer; or it's a beach house that sleeps 22 and has its own marina. THE BEACH is Lake Michigan. THE LAKE is whichever Great Lake you are closest to. THE BRIDGE is MACKINAC and never ever pronounced "Mackinack." We have CIDDIES like GRARAPIDS, DihTROIH, Pah-NEEACK, BADDLE CRICK, an AnNARBOR. After coming home from THE PLANT we park our CAHRR in the GRAAGE and then pull A COLE ONE outta the FRIGERRAIDER. Otherwise we STAHP by the SEVENuhLeven an gedduh PAHP. Soda is something you bake with. We eat a SAMWICH, drink MELK, and have SHERBERT for dessert. We make a MICHIGAN LEFT and pass on the RIGHT. Driving the SPEED LIMIT warrants road rage. We blast through RUSH HOUR traffic at 85 mph past state troopers because they are looking for the guys doing 100. If we get pulled over we go to the SECRETARIAHSTATE. Our state bird is the MUSKEEDA which has been known to carry away cats and even small children. G's in verbs are always silent, R's are always hard, and we end our sentences with a PREPOSITION, like. T's in the middle of a word and not supported by another consonant are pronounced like a D, and when coupled with an "N", they get dropped like the useless energy-wasting consonants that they are.
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by Tim The Toolman Taylor March 29, 2008

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A state that always says fuq u to anything and anyone. Detroit is the Unofficial capital of this badass state and overshadows the real capital which is Lansing
Snows on Saturday
Muddy by Monday
Michigan doesn't care about your snowdays
by bananly August 26, 2011

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Like, a REALLY big poo.
Fiona had a nice orgasm when Jonas dumped a Michigan on her chest and started titty fucking her.
by DinoCoat March 19, 2017

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A nightmare that never ends.
Horrible weather,lack of jobs,government is broke,roads suck.
Take this from someone who lived there for over 10 years. I grew up there and the job market is awful. Especially for those who want to go into the entertainment Business.
The weather is bipolar. The price of rent is awful. You have to live here long enough to complain.
When its snowing in may. You know your in michigan.
by holmeschapel June 14, 2015

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A state with constant weather changes, like you never knew could exist. it can be warm like summer one day, and freezing cold the next. There is hardly anything to do in this state unless you live in the Upper Peninsula (abbreviated to become U.P., not to be confused with the famous disney movie up. They are called yoopers, not U.P.ers.) and you are an adventurous person willing to camp outside and/or snowboard constantly for entertainment.
Michigan person: Oh my god, there's nothing fun to do in Michigan

Non Michigan person: Why don't you go snowboarding?

Michigan person: Nah, I've been doing that all my life.
by michiganisboring December 13, 2010

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everyone's definitions are completely false. i live in michigan and most of what everyone's saying is based on the northern part of it. up north IS ugly, every time we go to our cottage i get really freaked out by all the hicks.

but where i live (oakland county) it's an absolutely gorgeous state. every few miles there's another beautiful lake and the summers are never boring because EVERYONE has a boat.

1. michiganders DO have accents. we pronounce our t's in the middle of words like "city" and "cottage" as d's (ciddy, coddage) and most of the time the t's at the end of words are dropped when we talk. we pronounce our a's in a very nasally tone like "that" is th-yaat, "bathroom" b-yaaathroom, and so on.

2. detroit is NOT that bad! there are some very nice parts of it but also very bad places.
by michiganderrr March 29, 2009

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It's a state of bitter, cocksure alcoholic former blue-collar laborers who can't find decent jobs because Michigan is an economic black-hole. It snows alot, and when it doesn't snow it's extremely fucking hot or ball-shrinkingly cold. Crime runs rampant in its urban centers and life just plain sucks in its small towns due to boredom. There are a lot of lakes, dunes and forests, but people from Michigan couldn't give two fucks about them because they are everywhere, and Michiganders have better things to do like drink and worry about paying bills they have no money for. Naturally, morons from out of state flock in droves to look at things that really aren't that interesting.

Michiganders are divided into two groups: Michiganders and Yoopers. Michiganders are like as described before. Yoopers are essentially Canadians, and basically not human. The only thing a Michigander hates more than other Americans and foreigners are Yoopers. Yoopers are too stupid and inbred to consider hating anyone else because they live happy-go-lucky lives as lumberjacks and have sex with their sisters and occasionally a beaver. Yoopers are very proud of themselves despite having little to be proud of, and call southerners "trolls" because they live "under da bridge, don'tcha know." Michiganders seethe with rage about this, but can't do anything about it because the logic is infallible in a retarded sort of way, and also beating up a Yooper is much like striking a child; fun, but frowned upon.
Michigander: "What the fuck are you so happy about?"
Californian: "I live in a state with nice weather and jobs."
Michigander: "Go fuck yourself!"

Yooper: *unintellible sing-songy nonsense that sounds like Canadian*
Michigander: "Goddamn Yoopers."
by Andrew's #1 Fan February 08, 2010

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"More jobs to be lost to Mexico."
"More people moving to the Sun Belt."
"The Big Three lose out to Toyota and the Japanese."
"The UAW announces yet again another strike at Saginaw's steering plant."
"Budget cuts force Detroit City Schools to announce another round of layoffs for teachers."
"Governor Granholm disappointed in the failed Cool Cities initiative."

Coming up at eleven.

Is michigan good for anything?
by goinggoinggone July 06, 2007

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