2. An axolotl who is just BEGGING for a mate, but their owner doesn't want to get another pet.
3. A penis.
Gotta go, I have to feed my Mexican Wanking Fish...
My pet axolotl Bubbles is SUCH a Mexican Wanking Fish. He drops his sperm everywhere in the tank and I'm too afraid to stick my hand in the tank to feed him.
I am saving up for that cute pair of pink high-heels and I don't want to get him a stupid mate!
Dude, do your fly up - I can see your Mexican Wanking Fish!