(1) A man is a being that is very rare to find. A man is all the a woman wants. This is mainly; Kind, sensitive, sweet, funny - not crude, interesting, loving, mature, protective - not obsessed, sharing and gentle. However because you are very unlikley to find a man, you extremly unlikly to find men. So instead we call them lads or players. However if you do find a real man you are very lucky, so be careful!
(2) Lads / Players are normally at least one of those things out. Most have the 'need' to be sexist and like to shout things such as 'bend over darlin' and such like. They also have no idea of decency and like to brag about their sex positions.
(3) Players quite often like to Shoulder surf and sweet talk you whilst having a look round to see whos better. Lads / Players also have never ending cheesy chat lines such as , "I've lost my number can I have yours?" and "I like your top but it would look better on my bedroom floor" etc.
(4) Lads / Players also have a tendancy to tell all their mates exactly what happened last night. Some even do this in front of the female concerned. This is a stereotype known as a Jerk
(1) Mary: OMG. I think . . . I could of found . . . a man!!
Louise: No way. Does he have any brothers.
Mary: Yes but they're players
Louise:Not a family of men then?
Mary: No just the one.
Louise:Oh well make sure you keep him to yourself or you'll have a fight in your hands.
(2)I was walking a long my street, minding my own business just walking past a construction site, lolly pop in mouth. Suddenly this lad shouts wehey love nice job you're doing sucking that. Come on want to try me out?
(3) Mary goes to a club and catches the eye of some player.
Player: Hello, wanna come for a dance sweetheart?
Mary: Not really.
Player: Oh come on darling. What could happen. Come and have a dance. Eh?
Mary: ooh go on then
Player: Oh sorry Ive just seen someone I need to talk to. Give me your number and Ill call you if I get lost.
Mary: You wish
(4) Louise: I cant believe how good it was last night
Lad: Yeah I know. Do wanna come meet my mates?
Lad:Hey guys how fit is she?
*Wolf whistles etc*
Lad: Well guess how hot she was last night? SO HOT. She is such a closet slut
Louise: OMG. You jerk
JERK: Chill babe
Things With Penises who tell women anything just to get intercorse
timmy is like most men he tells tina he loves her so he can get ass then he never speaks to her again.
Plural of man.more...
*Real men* are respectful of women as equals. Love their mamas. Hold doors open. Knock out other men who say stupid ass, sexist bullshit. Will lick pussy after they have been given a blowjob. Bring home an equal paycheck, then do an equal amount of housework and childcare. Don't get pissed off when their usual superior economic status is disrupted by a social shift that allows women to take a step closer to equality. Are strong and protective, while also being loving and gentle. Have the character to restrain their temper. Have a brain in their head. Do not stereotype. Often come with big dicks.
Faux men say stuff like this in the women section of UD, then pop their zits, play some videogames, jack off, and begin to sob, and wonder why nobody will fuck them:
"The female of the human species, that are, more or less, emotionless blobs. Since emotions such as love compliment the human sex drive, men have a higher emotional drive to compliment their higher sex drive. Women, conversely... just wander around looking for another way to suck money out of a man, get him attached and then break his heart. And despite this fact, a woman will spend a good 75% of her time saying...
The reason for many of girl's problems. Mostly because they think they want anything more than to enter their magical vaginia.
Crying Girl: Why are you so insensitive?!?!??!
Guy: Halo and beer godamnit!
Crying Girl: What?!?!?!
Guy: You'll never understand.....
Crying Girl: (Men......)
has to be macho all the time. dont want to look "gay", even though its proven that more men have sexual thoughts about other men then women have about other women. A lot are very homophobic because they can't let anyone know they are gay or bi.
So girls ask your man if he would have sex with another man, and if he shows his disgust for more than a hour... hes gay.
"Are you gay jon?"
"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!! EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!! i would never do that!!!! EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!! thats gross!!!!!!!! thats sick!!!!!!!! dont ever ask me that again!"
1. Purely logical and emotionally stable, they will insult each other and gossip during their daily man talk, as well as throw epic manly hissy-fits when they FAIL. (Which is pretty much all the time.)
They secretly wish they had their own pair of boobies.
only men r on teh internuts lol!!!11one!11eleventyone!oneone1
Apparently, the better sex.
It's 2009, we really don't need to think we're all so great.
On behalf of all the idiots that call themseves men on this site, ladies, belive me, we are not all like that. Some of us are actually not sexist testosterone filled nut jobs.
If you ever get married, try and avoid those types.
Douche-Men are better than women woooooo!
Normal man- No we're not. We're good at differant things, geez you'd think we were living in the fifties.
i think i seen one of those the other day
1 out of every million men is a real man