Sex with someone I love.
- Woody Allen
Don't knock masturbation -- it's sex with someone I love.

Woody Allen in Annie Hall, 1977
by mandingoe November 07, 2005
to play with one's self while still in one's pants
masturbate, fondle the gonads, masturbation
by Lev Mattis Yahu January 12, 2009
The simplest, cheapest, safest and most practiced kind of sex.
Enjoyed by pretty much anyone in the world
Masturbation is good for prostate health
by Bangbangpewpew December 16, 2010
slamming the noodle
tickling the hoe
cooking the turkey
Gabby's tickling the hoe with Luke masturbation.
Beka's cooking the turkey with Danielmasturbation.
by mikeikes June 03, 2009
pleasure acquired from the act of touching ones own privates.
text message
female: have you ever had masturbation frustration?

male: stoking my penis..
female: palming my clit naked on my bed. my legs are open.
male: good girl. how would you treat my johnny if you were here?
female: i'd suck you dry...

male: ooo? then you deserve a palm job till you squirt.
female: mm i like your big hands.
by naughtygirl November 17, 2013
One of the most popular ways of entertaintme today, among internet, videogames and television.
I stay home today, but I had fun anyway... masturbation? nah I dont that...
by Toronto Raptors January 26, 2008
Self improvement or pleasing oneself.
Rick: Did you see John working out?

Steve: Yeah, he is totally masturbating his ego.

Self improvement is masturbation, self destruction on the hand...
by Raakam_revolver September 12, 2012
The act of self stimulation by stroking, rubbing, or pulling your genitals. Men usually rub, sometimes women will buy dildos or finger themselves. Masturbation can result in ejaculation if the person is stimulated enough. Men/women usually perform this act when intercourse is not an option.
For people with small brains:Masturbation is touching your penis to make it feel good, or for women sticking their fingers in their vaginas.
Guy 1:Sheila is too tired to have sex, and I'm bored.
Guy 2:Why don't you try masturbation?
Guy 1:Isn't that for complete losers?
Guy 2:No dude, it's completely normal and healthy.
Guy 1:I might try it, then.
by Maximizer August 05, 2012

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