15
One of the biggest clubs in the world. No, You aren't the biggest, Mancs. Says who? Messi and the rest of Barca
do. But you're the best in the UK and most successful. Feel better?

Their gaffer, although he is a legend, is also a whisky-nosed gobshite. Known to have every official in the F.A. in his lap from Mike Riley to the Northwest Counties Premier league part-time ref. Likes to look at the fourth official and tap his watch his to intimidate him, especially if Yernited are losing. Naturally, this results in a rediculous and usually unustifiable amout of extra time added, to allow United to nick a result.

Also likes to flail his arms wildly in rage and jump around like a twat if a ref does dare stand up to him and not rule in Yernited's favor, all while sipping on Heineken on the touchline.

The best player on earff (well according to Mancs, anyway) plays for them. Cristiano Ronaldo, and yes, he is class. However, he is a miserable little twit who flies through the air at the slightest touch, usually making sure he is convieniently inside the opposition box, and convieniently
when Yernited happen to be losing, in search of a penalty. In the rare event that a peno is not given, he likes to join in with his teammates in surrounding and bullying the official.

When not doing this he can be found modelling bird's clothing , crashing cars into guardrails, and sexing up the local Mancunian transvestites for cash.

Their supporters - oh my, lol. Most of them are from the following: Asia, Middle East, London, for the most part.
99.5% of them couldn't locate Manchester on a map, never mind say they have been to Old Trafford. I'm not quite sure how they even watch United, since most of them
are either huddled in mud huts or are too poor to afford a television, if you review the above locations I mentioned. Not that they're missing anything, well they aren't missing
any atmosphere by not being at O.T. cos there is none, just 70,000 different accents, none of them English, munching away on prawn sarnies.

Any attempt to slight Yernited to Yernited supporter is usually met with the good old rebuttal "How many trophies have you lot won?"

When you go to Old Trafford, you will be amazed by the lack of actual team songs that Manc fans have, other then "Glory, Glory Yernited!". Usually what you
hear are : songs about scousers, songs about Liverpool FC, songs about Hillsborough, songs about Heysel, songs about Good ol Leeds, and songs about Citeh. You will
also see numerous banners concerning those 3 clubs as well in the ground. But they aren't obsessed or bitter, no not them lot! lol.

On the topic of Hillsborough, they seem to find humor in singing about dead scousers, yet get all uptight when scousers or Leeds fans sing about Matt Busby and Munich, or when Fabian Delph made the aeroplane gesture at Oldham after scoring earlier this season. Hypocriticla much?

There you have it folks. Yernited. Doubt most people will like it, but what do you expect? I'm a leeds fan!
Leeds fan : The Mancs are singing "We all hate Leeds scum" again....

mate: are Manchester United playing Leeds in a Cup game or summat?

Leeds fan : Naw, they are just gobshites who are so bitter and obsessed with us they can't stop thinking of us

mate: ah yea, mate, figured so. dont most Mancunians support Citeh anyway?

Leeds fan: aye....
by The Mad Hatter 55 June 02, 2009
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16
Greatest football team in the world...(we're talking REAL football, not that crap American's call football) sometimes known as the Mighty Reds
"My baby takes the morning train. He works from 9 to 5 and then he takes another home again to find me... watching the Manchester United football team! Eh? The best freamin' team in all the land! Whoo-hoo!" ~Scotty, in EuroTrip
by DARKJESTER April 06, 2005
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17
An Awesome team with amazing skill. Known for tradition and glamour. You can argue that they have glamour but not tradition. Tradition is amazing in this team. They have always brought up players when they were young and made them world class players.e.g Giggs, Scholes, Nevilles, Beckham, Nicky Butt, Roy Keane. Ever notice that in many teams in the premierleague there is at least one person who used to play for Man United and this is why I will always be a Man United Fan. Excluding all of the trophies they have won.
Rio Ferdinand passes it to Giggs, an amazing run by Giggs his moving and twithching left to right, can you believe it a man in his 30's acting like a teen, but this is still Ryan Giggs finally passes it to Rooney and shot and Its a GOALLLLLLL!!!!!! This is Manchester United we are talking about.
by Doma December 18, 2004
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18
the only greatest football club in the world.
Beckham... into Sheringham, and Solskjaer has won it!!

History is made. Manchester United are the champions of Europe again, and nobody will ever win the European Cup final more dramatically than this! Champions of England, Champions of Europe, Winners of the F.A. Cup, everything their hearts desired!

Down and out, not a bit of it, they are never out!
by International Bad Boy February 17, 2005
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19
The Greatest football team on earth. Draws derison from lesser teams because of sucess. Sadly a number of fans are glory hunters. Thankfully there is still a large number of true supporters and each one hates the glory hunters. The richest football club without unlimited millions from some tax evading Russian. Fans have seen the club through difficult times on many occasians and have been rewarded spectaculary. Malcolm Glazer threatens the existence of the football club, hoping to heap great debt upon the club and force the players to play in an empty stadium because everyone hates him so much. So rich that almost £30 million was wasted on the waste of talent that was Juan sebastian Veron.
by Phillip February 10, 2005
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20
Man United are a football team in England who were very successful in the nineties, but now are not. Most Mancunians support rivals Man City, most of the support comes from the South of England, Cyrus, Malta, USA and East Asia. Everyone used to hate them as they were bloody good, now they aren't that good, so no one cares much about them. This annoys them.

Fans are famously low in football knowledge.
Manchester United football fans club- 2000 members (Down from 10000 in the ninties)
1 from Manchester
600 from South England
100 from Cyrus
100 from Malta
199 from USA
1000 from East Asia
by billy-bob-billy July 31, 2006
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21
A team that got bought by an Anerican.
Malcom Glazer owns Manchester United!
by usaguy March 12, 2006
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