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1.
A long, thin, flying coffin made by McDonnel Douglas. Exists in a number of poisonous variants such as the MD-82. Appalling deep-stall characteristics, ludicrously high landing speed even with full flap, and delightful flame-out prone engines. The design was originated by the Japanese in 1944 as a Kamikaze weapon, but was deemed too unstable and unsafe. Makes pilots wish they were flying something safe and stable, like one of the early Illyushins.

"What the hell's that noise ?"

"Oh, just an MD-80 clawing its way to V1"
by Eighth of Seven August 23, 2008
 
2.
The most beautiful aircraft ever made. Produced from 1980 to 1999 by McDonnell Douglas (and later Boeing after the merger of the two) as an updated version of the venerable DC-9. The MD-80 was originally designated DC-9-80 and marketed as the "Super 80". The MD-80 was been popular with airlines for its low operating cost and quiet operation when first introduced and continues to be due to its rugged construction and proven reliability.
I love flying on an MD-80 as long as I'm not in the back 3 rows!
by Don Douglas June 17, 2007