A guy who is whipped, and sucks up to you just to get some.
Also who uses excessive smiley faces, and when he wants to hang out claims he's busy and will "stop by."
Guy: Yeah girl I love chick flicks, we can watch them whenever :) :) :)
Girl: You are seriously such a kelp.
an undersea cabbage.
i swam amongst kelp in the sea.
Used in place of cool, chill, ok, etc.
Does 6:30 sound good to meet up?
A conversation made up entirely of dead birds...
Joe: That movie was amazing!
Sam: Sure, if you've got a map of it.
Joe: But the kelp is really green this year.
Sam: I like barbecue.
...and the conversation continues like this until someone screams or the world explodes.
Low grade Marijuana that is stringy and inexplicably moist like someone sprinkled water on it.
Hey that bag of kelp you sold me didn't even get me high.
Annoying troll which lives underground,preferably it's mother's basement.Where it can spew it's hatred upon all via the internet to feel good about it's self.Can be found licking the floors of peep show booths. Has the mentality of a 12 y/o boy, as well as size and genitalia,if at all.Anything that can be said to a kelp will be twisted in such a way to make itself seem better than everyone.
Guy 1. I have a nice car. kelp. you're a fag, and you live in your mother's basement. Guy 2. My girlfriends hot! kelp. She's a bitch! I only go out with hot chick's, that's all I ever get, they all love me , because I'm such a stud, they all get in line for me!etc., ad nauseum.
Pudgy little asshole who mocks others in chatrooms, to feel good about their own "shortcomings".
"All that jerk does is make fun of everyone in the chatroom, he's a real kelp".