To those of us with an actual musical taste buds and judgment, they make them, well, literally gag.
LOOKS: The Jonas Brothers have the tendency to dress up in brightly colored skinny jeans wow, this will make us look cool and unique!!, awkward vests, and shirts with sleeves rolled up to add the manly effect, usually accessorized by hats, bracelets, and rings. All three have the habit to squint at the camera in pictures for no apparent reason.
Ability: The youngest one, Nick Jonas, sounds like a frog was shoved down his throat and is trying to nurse it back up his throat by squealing followed by occasional yelps that sound like dying pigs. Joe Jonas' voice is still stuck in between in that awkward stage of developing is vocal cords. Kevin Jonas is always seen strumming a guitar even though he plays no role in the band.
Fan Base: Annoying girls who only think they know what the "JB" is really about: inspiration, friendliness, blahblah. But they don't know without Disney channel, the JB wouldn't be anywhere.
Overall, this so-called-band doesn't deserve all the fame and money. Fans need to start growing up and listening to real music, real bands.
FAN2: OMJJJJ i loveeeeee joe he is so funny!!!?!!!
FAN3: JB FAN FUREVER
The Jonas Brothers are yet another result of the tween pop sensations of the extremely greedy Disney channel empire.
Person 2: No, shut up and go listen to real music instead of drooling over people who don't even write/play their own songs.
Man #2: Um...no?
Man #1: Oh. Um, is that a bad thing then?
Man #2: I would think so.
Man #1: (feels down pants) Holy shit! My nuts are jelly!
Man #2: Seems like you've got the Jonas Brothers, my friend.
Man #1: Oh my god, how could this happen? I was so careful.
Man #2: Did you have sex with that Hannah Montana girl Miley Cyrus?
Man #1: Shit! She told me she was safe!
2) A group of sodomizers.
3) Penis suckers.
4) Another word to describe men who insert objects twice the size of pineapples into their anus for pleasure and don't remove them for two weeks in order to stretch their butthole to its largest.
5) The lack of douche.
6) Tight pants wearing cross-dressers.
7) An anal yeast infection. Highly contagious.
8) Racist bastards who believe in nothing but the killing and deletion of African American and Jewish people. They use their music to hide secret messages from the public.
9) Descendants of KKK grandmasters.
10) A group of Jew-cunt faggot bitches that likes chode down their throats.
Joe Jonas: Me too. Let's go find a cock to choke on.
Other Jonas bitch: Let's Jonas Brothers!
2) Hick: You're one of dem Jonas Brothers! We don't accept your kind around this here town!
Jonas Brothers: Let's sodomize you, hillbilly! You're gonna take it!
3) Jonas Brothers: (sucking cock) Yummmmmm.
Man: You guys are a bunch of Jonas Brothers.
4) Woman: Doesn't that hurt your anus from all that Jonas Brothering?
Nick Jonas: Nope, it feels quite good to Jonas Brother.
Joe Jonas: I need something seven times the size of a pineapple now! My anus is stretched so far if I fell on someone's head I'd literally swallow them into my body.
5) Man: Your vagina's starting to smell like the Jonas Brothers!
Woman: I have a lack of douche, sorry.
6) Nick Jonas: (in dressing room) Are my pants too tight?
Other Jonas Brother: We're the Jonas Brothers. Of course not!
Joe Jonas: I think I lost my vagina in these pants.
7) Man: I have a burning sensation in my pants, doctor.
Doctor: I'm sorry to report that you have a serious case of the Jonas Brothers.
Man: How long do I have to live?
Doctor: I'm afraid not long. I'd say around three hours. It's that bad.
8) Man: Shit!
Black Man: Shit, it's the Jonas Brothers! RUN!
Jonas Brothers: We're gonna get you, nigga!
9) Jonas Brothers: (on stage dressed as KKK Klansmen) I'm sure glad to be a Jonas Brother! My grandparents would be so proud of us!
10) Man: Fuck, it's the Jonas Brothers. Kill me now.
Jonas Brothers: (choking on cock) I sure like chode down my throat! Mmm!
Monkey: HOOO HEEE hOOOO HEEE!
Jonas Bro 2: Holy shit! That monkey's talented! Alright guys lets go record this.
And another Jonas Brothers song is created, ready to receive the adoration of their devoted fans.
Just a bunch of religious-wackjob pretty boys in vests and dress-shirts with too much eyeliner.
Me: Here, this should help! *slides CD "Nevermind" by Nirvana into CD player*
Someone: Ah, thank you! So much better. *sighs and begins to play air guitar to "Smells Like Teen Spirit"*
For example, their song "Burnin' Up" refers to their inability to "get it up" and as a result get Prostatitis. Their other equally crappy song "I Am What I Am" refers to them all coming out of the closet while their song "The Muffin Man" discusses weather the muffin man could, in fact, be a female (with debatable herpes aka "blueberries").
By signing this band, Disney is promoting erectile dysfunction and hermaphrodites. There is possible "Jonascest" occurring within the band and anyone who listens to them is a racist.
Sensible person with music taste: STFU bitch, Jonas Brothers suck more dick than a homosexual during Mardi Gras.