Irish God of Sarcasim- fabled to be the most sarcastic deity of any civilization. John could kill a an army of men with a sarcastic comment. Stories tell of John having such a horrid reputation for ruining lives with his sarcasm. That is why the common day toilet is also called a "john"..
Tim: Why is that person always sarcastic?
Bill: Oh they worship John.
by sharpiedeathray August 29, 2013
A young male with a surprisingly large head. Someone who constantly watches television and/or games regularly. Someone in "John's," life has him wrapped round him/her's finger.
"That guy John, with the large head, he's never off."
by Baby John November 05, 2011
Probably the best and most perfect guy anyone could ever meet. He's cute, amazing, sweet, and everything a girl is looking for. Has the cutest smile, a great sense of humor, makes others laugh, takes care of his girlfriend 24/7 (even longer than that however), etc. John is probably the best human being alive and he also makes cute babies and writes cute paragraphs and has a sexy voice.
Person #1: Woah.. who's that?
Angry Girlfriend: That's my baby John *proud*
by john's princess June 20, 2014
John likes hairy nipples. Lovely guy though.
Me: Hey John whats your favourite thing
John: Big hairy Nipples
by You_know_who September 23, 2013
A very sweet, caring, loving, attached and compassionate person. You can and will never fight with him.

He has his head and heart in place and

is totally committed to everything he does.

He will never take you for granted. He will make you smile, and Care for your likes n dislikes. He will always make you smile, and is a very charming and funny person. He is perfect. He is a soldier. Deserves to be loved and cherished.never let him go. He is the one.
I'm glad I found you. I love you john.
by poochameow August 18, 2013
Brittney's future boyfriend =]
Brittney: John will you be mine?
John: of course!
by His future August 22, 2011
According to google dictionary! John means:

a toilet.

a prostitute's client.
John is so hot that he can attract all the females in the entire planet, but he can't keep any of them, at the end he ends up with a whore. John is so handsome that his lover gave up on him and will not even use him as a toilet.
by too good looking February 01, 2014

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