A man who will save your ass when you die.
Don't be hate'n on Jesus cause he is going to save your ass one day.
by oconnell 09 September 04, 2006
The savior of the christian people. Christians believe he is the son of god and the messiah. They also believe he died for man kinds sins against each other. No real proof exists that he ever lived. That, like every religion, does not stop people from following in the way of jesus.
Jesus was crucified, man that must of sucked.
by Oz March 19, 2005
The Son of God sent down to the world of the living to purify the sins of the world and remind people of the scriptures. He died on a cross so that we could be forgiven. Some would denounce Jesus as a fag, but if that is what you think, I truly pity you. Some denounce Jesus by claiming that there is no God. I forgive you, but I will state one thing: if there was no God, all things would be possible.
When Jesus died on the cross, the blood from his wounds flowed like a healing ointment to cleanse us of our sins, just a rubbing alchohol cleanses a wound.
by da outkast February 17, 2005
a mythical creature belived to have speacil powers.
guy: did u read that story book
dude: the bible
guy: yeah
dude: jesus christ is so fake he's the old super man
by d.skaife May 08, 2008
KK he's the awsomest koolest dude there was and IS. Died on the cross 4 everyone, to forgive ur sins - not that u can sin whenever u want. He loves evryone who has good in there heart.
If u don't u can still become a Christian by praying and asking 4 forgiveness and meaning it. And reading the Bible - it's ALL
true and it's Gods word to us. Seriously go 4 it, being a Christian is awsome and will change ur life 4 better. : )
Dudette- "whos Jesus"?
Dude- "a righteouss dude,he loves u so much"
Dudette- ooooo
by Jesus-is-dah-man September 19, 2006
1. An exclamation of recieving or nearly recieving a curse from above.

2. An accusatory statement or excuse for delivering or doing evil.


In Hebrew the word Hsus is horse, through translations from the Greek eh-sus became the modern Jesus.

The prophets predict that God would send a devine punisher horse (Hsus) if the Israel nation (Jews are a tribe of) fell and did not do the law that Moses delivered.

A horse that was born from the word via the consequences of rebelion against doing the law. (In hebrew rebelion is Mry - thus concieved from rebelion). If they did the law, there would be no horse.

It is written chose life or chose death, chose a blessing or chose a curse. Most of this hinges around a single God prohibiting the worship of more than one God or representing God as a man or woman form as well as anything below the seas, on the land or in the heavens.

Jesus however is claimed to be an incarnation man-form of God.

Jesus had no power of his own, but recieved it through a bolt of lightning in the shape of a dove when he went down into the valley of the dead. In contrast Moses walked up a mountain and had to remove his shoes because the land was holy ground and was not struct by lightning.

Jesus is also represented as a dead first begotten son (Israel) on a capital punishement cross.

Jesus only collected the fallen Jews (sinners and law breakers), to, as he put, it "burn up the chaf", "to bring war" and "to put an axe to the root of Israel".

He clearly states in correction of those who think he is the Messiah to bring peace, ingather the dispersed Jews and unite them preventing the temple fall, "I have not come to bring peace."

All of the things he states he is bringing are listed in the curses of the Old Testament and not in the messianic prophecies. The fall of the Temple that happened shortly afterwards is also in the curses.

The curses that Jesus is claimed by modern day followers to have been paid for in full and illiminated. Thus today you can hear people exclaim at the sight of what use to be considered a curse - "Jesus".
"Jesus!, how the hell can you say that about Jesus. I never read that he came to bring war."

"Jesus! its the cops pulling me over. I think I drank way too much."..."Help me God. Oh my God get me out of this".

"Jesus Christ! buddy. How could you be that ignorant? Are you touched in the head of something?"

"Jeeezzzusss! that lightning bolt was awfully close."

"What the b'Jesus! a bee flew up my arm sleeve and keeps stinging me."

"Jesus H Christ, bubba I just shot myself in the foot"

"Jesus made me do it. I hear his voice in my head so I done the bitch like he told me."

"Jesus, I'm Jesus dont you see?"

"Jesus Christ! thats freaky, this machine press malfunction almost took my head off."

"Jesus, I never saw them coming. I most have been day dreaming when I pulled into traffic without looking."

"Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!"..."Please God let the pilot get control of the plane".

"Jesus spared me, its a miracle I not dead, just a broken arm and some cuts when I was thrown 500ft, what a blessing I lost everything in the tornado and subsequent flash flood but I am alive. Praise Jesus I am so lucky!. Jesus! that was a close call"
by Yehoshua611 October 16, 2007
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