Man who was nailed to a plank for saying how nice it would be if everyone was nice to each other. Had his message misinterpreted by millions who now think it is their job to persecute certain groups of people(christians).
Jesus:be nice to others.
by Jonjo January 15, 2005
My mexican gardener, he does a great job
Me: Jesus, you did a great job on the tulips yesterday!

Jesus: Gracias!
by Anastacia Beverhausen October 06, 2005
A good answer for pretty much anything.
Billy: Hey Tom, what's the answer to #2?
Tom: Jesus.
by Allie, that Greek kid. December 05, 2006
THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS IRISH:
1. He never got married.
2. He never held a steady job.
3. His last request was a drink.

THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS PUERTO RICAN:
1. His first name was Jesus.
2. He was always in trouble with the law.
3. His mother didn't know who his father was.

THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS ITALIAN:
1) He talked with his hands.
2) He had wine with every meal.
3) He worked in the building trades.

THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS BLACK:
1) He called everybody brother.
2) He had no permanent address.
3) Nobody would hire him.

THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS CALIFORNIAN:
1) He never cut his hair.
2) He walked around barefoot.
3) He invented a new religion.

AND FINALLY, THE PROOF THAT JESUS WAS JEWISH:
1) He went into his father's business.
2) He lived at home until the age of 33.
3) He was sure his mother was a virgin, and his mother was sure He was God.
Jesus' tales.
- Why do Jews get a better deal in Heaven than the rest of them?
- Because they happen to be relatives of the Boss.
by alvit May 20, 2009
One of the good guys.
Apparantly Jesus saves people like Spider-man.
by Manga (Keelan) July 18, 2006
Saying "Jesus" backwards sounds like "Sausage" try it.
Jesus backwards:
Susej = Sausage!

Now thumbs up this comment, or I KILL YOU.
by HelloImAPizza August 19, 2010
The most well-known Jew, after Woody Allen.
Woody Allen is a mitzvah to humankind! Jesus? What chutzpah!
by copyjew January 10, 2005
a kid in my english class.
Jesus is mexican but speaks english gooder than me and i was born in america.
by m.m.b.b April 11, 2005

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