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8.
I was exposed to the Jehova's Witness "Truth," when I fell in love with a girl that was a witness. Although, I was raised Catholic, I was willing to investigate Jehovah's Witness doctrine believing it was fundamentally Christian. Therin, much to my shergrin I learned of my terrible misjudgement. Firstly, Jehovah's Witnesses claim almost an elitist stance that they are the only religion and that they take nothing away from the bible nor add anything. Secondly, they claim that the material earthly goal one should strive to attain is to live a life that is as Christlike as possible. (That is not only in study, speech but also in action. However, if one observes the practices of this so called religion from an objective, scholastic point of view, they will soon see JW's for what they are a masochistic and spiritually oppressive cult. I hope my personal experiences and observations will shed some light on what I am conveying. It would help to print the Webster definition of cult to illustrate my point.
The girl I fell in love with attended the Eagle Rock, California Jehovah's Witnesss Kingdom Hall and had since she was seven. At eighteen she became pregnant, bore an illegitimate child and received a public reprisal which for layman is a shunning of other members of the congregation. Would not the spirit of Christ inspire said Christians to help this girl emotionally and financially rather than close her out. Even her own family was told to shun her. Now for those of you that do not know JW Kingdom Halls are run by otherwise socially deficient men who oppress the freedoms and voices of women perhaps necessitated by the fact there are alot of beautiful women ussually black or hispanic and really geeky looking guys. Now throughout life young girls are taught that dating, marriage with non-believers (any non JW even if he is a Christian Pastor) or fear public dissfellowship which means the persons personal life is made public and noone in the congregation is allowed to so much as say hello to them. Stron Chrisian compassion huh? These zealots go so far as to put these womens house under surveillance and call at all hours taking away from their freedom. Further, the JW cult ensures for its self preservation by enforcing their will through religion as an all consuming lifestyle by making members attend congregation 6-12 hours a week plus field service. Nontheless girls will be girls and my sexy little JW managed 8 sexual partners in 10 years. Between us I have to say I benefited from the oppression she endured because the way this girl went at it made a Catholic girls look like saints. Needless to say a year into our physical relationship, the geeky old elders found out and publically reprimanded my girlfriend in front of the congregation. Her own family cant talk to her. She has to check in as if she were on parole now. Save yourself from losing you life and your soul. The JWs were created by a nutty guy named Charles Taze Russell less than 100 years ago. They have perverted, disected and miscommunicated the Bible's original message of LOVE. THEY ARE A CULT!!!!! If JW's were not full of bull why does 1/2 their meeting revolve around The WatchTower Publication which is a monthly magazine based on men's views of religious issues in the modern world (The have already predicted the end of the world 3 times-idiots)-In closing JWs are a small group of the world population claiming an esoteric knowledge of God's, demanding compliance by its members by use of fears, preying on the undereducated impoverished of our country/world (38% Latin, 44% Black, 18% white median income $20,240. CULT CULT CULT. Escape from the Watchtower a benevolent loving God will understand he gave you a life of your own to live!!!
by Michael Wright July 06, 2006
 
9.
The religion that sends people in suits to your door preaching their version of the bible.
Damn Jehovah's witnesses, I saw two men in suits at my door and microwaved my hard drive.
by Anonymous_is_legion March 18, 2008
 
10.
A Cult that believes in salvation by works. JW's original thought was that the 144,000 Jews mention in book of Revelation was them. However, after their membership reached 144,000, they panicked. That is when they added that if they get out and work, (eg. Knocking On Doors) that they might somehow be accepted by God.
Jehovah's Witness is an insecure cult for the foolish.
by Doug Hightower September 12, 2005
 
11.
A cult in the guise of a sanct of Christianity that uses brainwashing techniques to control the weak-minded, claiming to be the true prophet of God in their Watch Tower/Propaganda magazine. They don't celebrate holidays or even their own birthdays, and are discouraged from post-secondary education (i.e. college / university). This, obviously, is to leave future generations without the capacity to actually think and do a little research before they commit their lives to this mockery of a religion.

It's hard to believe that people still join this cult, which claims to be the true prophet of God, despite having falsely predicted the apocalypse at least six times since 1914. They have also changed their interpretations of the Bible and their doctrines, and sometimes even changed them back to what they read originally, and then back to the revised ones again, and (albeit rarely) back again to the original. What kind of prophet would be so indecisive?

The cult was started by someone who knew nothing of religious doctrine, and nothing of the original languages of the Bible. They claim that their translation is the one true translation, and that all others are the work of Satan.

They believe that governments are the work of Satan, and therefore do not vote, or even stand for their country's national anthem. They are also forbidden to salute their nation's flag. The Jehovah's Witness associated with Hitler against the Jewish people, and of course deny it. They also publicly renounce the United Nations, although secretly they had a strong relationship with the UN, but that was over as soon as the public found out.

And last but certainly not least, their widely criticized denial of accepting blood transfusions is the source of the most controversy. It isn't enough for the higher members of the cult who are aware of the fact that it is a cult to lead weak-minded people along a false spiritual path; they cause the deaths of so many people, especially children. Of course the children don't want the transfusions, they've been taught their whole lives that it is wrong by their parents. But the whole idea that “eating blood” is the same as a blood transfusion is ridiculous. The “don’t eat blood” scripture is the basis of the Jewish peoples’ Kosher laws. It’s one thing for a person of a mature age to condemn one’s self to death, but when a child is brainwashed his whole life into believing something ridiculous without knowing all the facts, that can never be justified by any scripture in any Holy text.
An eight year old girl, with her whole life ahead of her, was condemned to death the day her parents became members of the Jehovah's Witness cult. Had she recieved a simple blood transfusion, she would have survived. Had her parents not kidnapped her from the hospital to avoid the transfusion, she would have lived a long and happy life.
by damn johos December 06, 2005
 
12.
Jehovah's Witnesses try to live by the words of Jesus at John 13:34,35 which indicate that his true followers would be identified by their love for one another. This is one reason they do not take up arms or go to war.
Woman: "I don't like Jehovah's Witnesses because they refuse to join the military and fight for the freedoms they enjoy everyday. My son went to war and gave his life for his country."

Jehovah's Witness: "I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your son. But one thing you can be assured of, he didn't lose his life at the hands of one of Jehovah's Witnesses"
by gva April 20, 2006
 
13.
people who knock on your door to try and get you to join their religion
jahovah's witnesses are fucking anoying, the only religion i want to join is the do what you fucking want religion
by the fresh prince January 30, 2005
 
14.
A religious organization. It manifests many cult-like traits like all religions throughout history. Most hated by the common people for their tendency to spread their version of the bible to everyone, at any time. However, the JW is a rather docile and pleasant creature when their unrelenting urge to save all humanity is overlooked. They almost always travel in flocks of two or more.

Their closest cousin in behavior is the Mormon, although a JW is harder to get rid of and harder to catch off guard as they spend an average of three to five hours a week studying the bible and its related subjects.

As with all religions they have their own ideals, beliefs, practices and have been persecuted throughout history by all manner of peoples including such famous oppressors as Adolf Hitler and the Catholics.

Suggestion from an ex JW: When faced with a Jehovah's Witness pretend to be devotely Satanic and do not accept literature of any kind, no matter how small. Be extreme with the satanism, almost to the point of violence.
Close the curtains, that's a pair of Jehovah's Witnesses coming!
by Sarah the Shunga Bunny September 23, 2005