Let me first say I am a Jehovah's Witness so what I am going to say is what we actaully believe in.

Jehovah is the name of God and we are His witnesses to carry on His word through the Bible.

We do not believe in the Trinity, Jehovah is God and Jesus is His son.

We believe blood transfusions are wrong and this is because in the Bible it says not to use the blood of others (or at least in that similiar sense)

We are NOT a cult if we get money it is from members of the Kingdom Hall we don't just knock on your door and say Hey can we have your money.

We come to your door because we want everyone to have knowledge of Jehovah (and when we come to your door we show respect and it would be nice to get it in return)
We don't celebrate the holidays because they are considered pagen so we do not particpate.

We follow the Bible it points us in the right direction and gives us faith and allows us to gain knowledge of Jehovah and His son Jesus.

We also believe that once you die you are cleared of your sins and you can live in paradise but if you try to go back to sinful ways you will be gone.

We believe there is not a Hell where you burn for eternity because of a life of wrong-doing and everyone does not go to Heaven only the chosen few, when you die the dead are unconcious of everything but you will be awaken by Jesus to live in the world of paradise.


I might not be right about every aspect but this is what I have learned through my father and I am only 16 so I have time to correct myself. I just wanted to do this because so many have a wrong impression of the people who are the same religion as me, and I wanted to give them correct information.
Jehovah's Witnesses are like normal people and just try to spread knowledge so everyone has the same oppurtunity.
by Melly :-) December 23, 2008

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Top Definition
A group of people who's faces are flat from getting doors slammed in their faces.
Jehovah's Witness: Ouch, my face feels like Kansas.
by slatte November 09, 2006

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The name of a religious cult who get brainwashed by mind control techniques into believing that their interpretation of the Bible is better than anyone else's.

It was started by some idiot that got this vision of the world coming to an end in 1914. When 1914 came and went, he then managed to pursuade his flock that it would happen in 1942. When 1942 came and went, well let me put it this way... Anyone who would even think about joining this cult is mentally ill to begin with.

They publish some toilet trash called the Watch Tower and are also known as the Watch Tower Society and JWs. In 1933 their leaders conspired with Hitler against the Jews. Several of their top members were thrown in jail for committing fraud, larceny, sexual deviant acts, etc. But somehow the cult manages to go on. Go figure.

If a member deviates in any way from their way of life all other members are required to scorn them. This is just one of their many mind control techniques.

But the worse thing about JWs is that every year hundreds of children die because these geniuses think that "Thou shalt not eat blood" refers to life saving transfusions instead of becoming a vampire.
Jehovah's Witnesses are the "False Prophets" that God refers to in the Bible. When one comes to your door, just give them a copy of the letter their leaders sent in support of Hitler and tell the bigots to fuck off.
by Alfie The Horndog August 10, 2005

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Students of the Bible who preach the "Kingdom of God." They claim that their God--Jehovah--is using Jesus Christ to bring an end to the world as we know it.
One of Jehovah's Witnesses knocked on my door, shared a scripture, and offered me a Watchtower magazine.
by Mack C January 14, 2007

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The perfect example of why not to open the door to strangers.
I almost wished they were serial rapists when I found out I had opened my door to 2 Jehovah's witnesses.
by s0x0r September 07, 2005

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A person who, despite all efforts to make them stop, refuses to stop calling, showing up, or otherwise attempting to make contact with another person.
After I dumped her, she went all Jehovah's Witness on me.
by SabineLaGrande June 08, 2004

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A rare breed, they usually travel in groups. They can be found roaming through neighborhoods standing on the doorsteps of homes. In the event that you see a Jehovah's witness follow these steps. Close the curtains, shut off the tv, and hide. The jehovah will then proceed to ring your door bell, stay calm dont make any sudden movements, this will enrage the witness but they will soon leave, but watch out they still may be watching.
Jeff: o shit hide the Jehovah's witness are coming

Jehovah's witness: "ding dong"..........those MOTHER FUCKERS!

Bob: that was a close one.
by Avalache2121 July 11, 2008

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A bunch of rats who insist on forcing their religious beliefs on the general public at all costs, including harassment.
A whole bunch of Jehovah's Witness freaks woke me up on my day off last week, what a bunch of subversive losers!
by Piranha April 24, 2006

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